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Post by anointedteacher on Jan 11, 2008 12:33:25 GMT -5
This was in the bulletin on myspace.... You may want to add to the list.... Men can start another thread for women "Are You With The Wrong Woman" ----------------- Bulletin Message ----------------- From: "Single, Saved & Having Sex" by Ty Adams Date: Jan 11, 2008 9:48 AM Is the man you're seeing really into God like he says? Well, he's not into God if: 1. He's been saved for 10 years but can't be celibate for 10 minutes. 2. He has no church home or always in "visiting" mode. 3. He thinks because he wears a cross that God will overlook his lifestyle. 4. He thinks that "God don't like ugly" is a scripture. 5. He goes to have communion in the bar. 6. He's on his way to church but the clothes he wore to the club last night are in the backseat of the car. 7. He uses church as the dating game. 8. He's well versed in scriputure but doesn't live it. 9. He thinks God will excuse his sexual activities becasue he does so much work in the church. 10. He thinks that repentance is just for sinners. 11. He's been divorced 3 times because "God hasn't sent him the right woman yet." 12. He says it's okay to drink because Jesus turned water into wine. 13. The only time he prays is when he's saying grace. 14. His Myspace profile says he's a Christian but his top friends are naked women. 15. His favorite praise & worship song is R. Kelly's "You Saved Me." 16. He thinks the book of Job is the job classifieds. 17. You've never seen him pray or read the Bible. 18. He doesn't tithe because he thinks that it's to pay for the Pastor's Cadillac. 19. He doesn't tithe because he says he can't afford it. 20. The only gospel artist he knows is Kirk Franklin. 21. He thinks he's saved because he went to Sunday school when he was a kid. 22. If he's always using these 2 statements: "God knows my heart" or "Only God can judge me." 23. He thinks that you don't have to go to church to prove that you are saved. 24. He thinks that Run's House is TV ministry. 25. He thinks God will excuse fornication if you love the person. Don't waste your time or your life on a man that's not into God. Because if he's not into God, he won't be into you. Dr.Ty www.tyadams.orgwww.myspace.com/tyadamsonlineDon't waste your life! Find out if he's really the one. Suggested Material: *Are You With The Wrong Man Pack* Available at www.tyadams.org |
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Post by anointedteacher on Jan 11, 2008 12:36:50 GMT -5
This is one response..... to the List. Jan 11, 2008 10:40 AM Subject: A must read for everyone..Don't be close-minded!! Body: I highly respect this women of God, but God placed it on my heart to speak up for the other of "number eleven".... You know Dr. Ty, I will have to say for the first time ever; I disagree with you on one of these...Don't get me wrong..I agree with the rest, but one of these really bothered me because we can't assume why certain things might have happened to a person regarding their history based off of an statistic...I'll have to give you a small "piece" of my personal testimony and hopefully, afterwards; you will understand why I disagree with #11..Before I devoted my life to God I got married young and was in the military..My wife decided that she hadn't "lived" life enough and decided that marriage wasn't for her...I don't regret the time we were married because my only child came from it and I have a great relationship with her mother..Part/marriage 2..This happened after I devoted my life to Christ for real and was in ministry...First of all, I'll admit I chose the wrong one (single people hit me up whenever you want guidance about waiting on God for I have paid a heavy price to be able to minister to ya'll on this subject) ; instead of waiting on God..The problem was I had my pastor constantly preaching it's not good for man to be alone..it's better to marry than to burn and all the other "single" cliches and next thing you know those "seeds" influenced to marry before I was "fully" married to Him and she was a "church girl" (over the youth group, father was a rev., knew the bible inside out, knew every song and etc.)...She ended up abusing me behind close doors in every form of abuse and I mean every..I ended up runninng for my life (seriously, I left with just my clothes, 100.00 and most of all, my faith)..My pastor was even the one who told me to leave before I was killed in the house..Part/marriage 3..This was the one that God had chosen, but when the calling of being married to a world changer got tough as God started shaping her to walk beside me and us to begin to forfill the propehcy that had been spoken over our lives in the beginning of our marriage (even though we were pre-warned before marrige and during by a bunch of different prophets of God that in the first three years of marriage we were going to go through what an average would go through in a life time because of the "high call" of a marriage ministiry God had placed on our lives to stop the increasing divorce rate in the church)...she abandoned me when the testing/shaping period was at its peak even though she knew the cost, she was willing to "leave me behind"..she decided it was too much for her and walked away..So, I know I'm a great man of God (not arrogrant, for I am very humble..but I know my worth in His eyes) and number 11 could cause many women to miss out on their blessing because of their trust in you, Dr. Ty ...For no one knows the story behind someone else's journey and "numbers" don't always tell the true story!..Just wanted to be a spokesperson for the other side of your number eleven reason..  .. |
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Post by kitty on Jan 12, 2008 16:10:36 GMT -5
AT,
This is a really good post! I'm going to copy it and send it around!
Kitty
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Post by anointedteacher on Jan 12, 2008 18:19:19 GMT -5
What you think about the prophet response, I deleted his name to protect his privacy....
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Post by kitty on Jan 12, 2008 21:05:40 GMT -5
AT,
I think he just doesn't want to acknowledge that women should be leary of getting involved with him. I most definitely think that people should be careful when dealing with a person that have been married several times.
My aunt was married 3 times but she's 96 years old had these marriages stretched out over her life. Her first husband cheated on her. The other 2 she simply out lived.
But even so I'm sure someone would be a bit leary of her to get married again... I mean at this point one would indeed have to wonder if she was a "black widow". LOL Heck I know I am leary of men who tell me that their wives have died. Unless it was something like cancer... I back away.
Now I also know of 2 other men that have been married 3 times. Both of the men have some involvement with ministry and make awful husbands. I think by now women should know better.
One man is a Pastor of a church and now is on his 4th marriage... yes I said 4th !!! In the time that he has gone through 2 marriages the size of his chruch has dropped to half in attendance. I can't say what happened to the first 2 marriages. But he simply decided he didn't want to be with the 3rd.
She didn't cheat on him or anything like that. From what I can tell they just started not to get along. And he started to build a case against her like saying that she wasn't a good house keeper, and I guess not submissive enough.
The other guy is one of my cousins... bottom line. He was just a plain ole' cheater. But he got married 3 times... He claims he won't do it again. Yet a few of his girldriends have still tried to get him to the church to get married again. But he won't do it.
Sure I think it is possible for someone to have bad luck. But that doesn't mean that they rest of us shouldn't be leary and careful about dealing with a person who couldn't make a marriage work... Not just once... not just twice... But 3 times!
Oh yeah... Here's my last comment. How can his last wife be someone that "the Lord chose" but she just up and walked away?!! Doesn't the word say that what God has joined together let no man put asunder? Wouldn't that include the couple to God joined together? That they wouldn't separate themselves?
Kitty
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Post by livinganewlife on Jan 13, 2008 9:10:51 GMT -5
Oh yeah... Here's my last comment. How can his last wife be someone that "the Lord chose" but she just up and walked away?!! Doesn't the word say that what God has joined together let no man put asunder? Wouldn't that include the couple to God joined together? That they wouldn't separate themselves? Kitty Kitty, you know prophets are not held accountable to the Word of God only their revelation.........you know we have "major" prophets saying God told them to marry so and so but he gave them a beat down and a divorce just to take them to the next level........ Regardless of what the Bible says; if a prophet says it is so it is so.....hmmmmmmmmmmmm |
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Post by anointedteacher on Jan 14, 2008 15:09:19 GMT -5
AT, I think he just doesn't want to acknowledge that women should be leary of getting involved with him. I most definitely think that people should be careful when dealing with a person that have been married several times. My aunt was married 3 times but she's 96 years old had these marriages stretched out over her life. Her first husband cheated on her. The other 2 she simply out lived. But even so I'm sure someone would be a bit leary of her to get married again... I mean at this point one would indeed have to wonder if she was a "black widow". LOL Heck I know I am leary of men who tell me that their wives have died. Unless it was something like cancer... I back away. Now I also know of 2 other men that have been married 3 times. Both of the men have some involvement with ministry and make awful husbands. I think by now women should know better. One man is a Pastor of a church and now is on his 4th marriage... yes I said 4th !!! In the time that he has gone through 2 marriages the size of his chruch has dropped to half in attendance. I can't say what happened to the first 2 marriages. But he simply decided he didn't want to be with the 3rd. She didn't cheat on him or anything like that. From what I can tell they just started not to get along. And he started to build a case against her like saying that she wasn't a good house keeper, and I guess not submissive enough. The other guy is one of my cousins... bottom line. He was just a plain ole' cheater. But he got married 3 times... He claims he won't do it again. Yet a few of his girldriends have still tried to get him to the church to get married again. But he won't do it. Sure I think it is possible for someone to have bad luck. But that doesn't mean that they rest of us shouldn't be leary and careful about dealing with a person who couldn't make a marriage work... Not just once... not just twice... But 3 times! Oh yeah... Here's my last comment. How can his last wife be someone that "the Lord chose" but she just up and walked away?!! Doesn't the word say that what God has joined together let no man put asunder? Wouldn't that include the couple to God joined together? That they wouldn't separate themselves? Kitty You are right, but I feel sorry for the man. He a victim of bad wives.... First wife wasn't ready, she needed to live a single life a little longer and left   His second wife remind me of Bishop Weeks... Parent was a rev. but beat her husband behind close doors.... He had to run for his life.... Victim The third couldn't take the heat, when the prophecy that have been spoken over their life came to pass!!! and ran.... I pray he did a self evulation.... cause now he looking for #4 wife.... He a very nice looking man, a prophet and available for sale at a low price!!! ;D  .... Can I get the first Bit?  |
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Post by stillfocused on Jan 14, 2008 15:27:24 GMT -5
This brother seems to be decent and may have had some serious things arise in his life. I don't say write him off...just yet. Yet, just maybe he hasn't found the one that God has ordained for him to be with..from what I am seeing and hearing marriage is not something you enter into lightly. As for the last wife..just maybe she was the one..but, yet, not prepared to stand along side of him.
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Post by anointedteacher on Jan 14, 2008 15:33:21 GMT -5
This brother seems to be decent and may have had some serious things arise in his life. I don't say write him off...just yet. Yet, just maybe he hasn't found the one that God has ordained for him to be with..from what I am seeing and hearing marriage is not something you enter into lightly. As for the last wife..just maybe she was the one..but, yet, not prepared to stand along side of him. You may be right... He seem to be a very nice person and really have a relationship with the Lord. He want a wife to stand by his side, but his past make it really hard. He is a true man of God. |
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Post by stillfocused on Jan 14, 2008 15:49:59 GMT -5
Do you know this man ?
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Post by anointedteacher on Jan 14, 2008 15:51:35 GMT -5
Here a good one....
IS HE THE RIGHT ONE?
First we must allow our Heavenly Father to do the picking. And second, the decision for a mate must be made on a spiritual and intellectual basis before it's made on a emotional one."What about love? Shouldn't that be the third?
you ask. No, and I'll tell you why. "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? (Jeremiah 17:9).The heart is willful and is driven by its own agenda. It does not consider things rationally and intelligently it just loves to love! Therefore you have to point it in the right direction: "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the well spring of life" (Proverbs 4:23)!
Whenever you meet a man, you need to get clearance from God, check out his attributes, and then allow your heart to engage. Dating exists not for mating; it exists for collecting data. I believe that the biblical design would be friendship, courtship and then marriage.
Friendship is two people walking together in agreement and accountability, learning and growing together.
Courtship follows the mutual agreement to commit to one another exclusively - it is the decisive turning toward the agreed-upon goal of the marriage altar. It is a period of laying a foundation and preparing your life together after marriage.
But dating? Well, if you do date, use the time wisely to gather these facts.
1. Check out the fabric. Is the person mate material? Does this man have an intimate relationship with the Father through Jesus Christ? Does he care what God thinks about his behavior? Is he accountable to God as well as another co-laborer in the faith? Accountability is an important factor. It is imperative to maintaining a committed relationship. Is your potential spouse a member of the same family -the family of God?
You need to have common interests and values and agree on the essentials of living day to day. You have a similar spiritual walk. You eat the same spiritual diet. You enjoy a lot of similar things. You have like interests, like goals in life, like opinions on basic life issues.
You have had like experiences in your background. Though there is some truth to the idiom that opposites attract, like-minded folks fare better together.
Furthermore, does he want to get married? I f you want to be married and your dreamboat isn't interested, don't waste your time. Remember, women fall in love and get married. Men decide to get married and then look for a wife. Note the difference in order. So if a guy says he's not looking for anything serious, take his words seriously. If he's not going in your direction, get off the bus and wait for the right one.
2. Does this man want you? Is he pursuing you? The man who is right for you will pursue you, and God's hand in the relationship will be clear. No guessing, no fleeces, no dead ends. Scripture says: "He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives FAVOR from the Lord" (Proverbs 18:22). Note -who finds whom? THE MAN FINDS THE WIFE. From the beginning of time, God has transported men and women across the world in order to put them together. At the RIGHT TIME, He will bring that man on the scene and he will find you. In God's perfect design, the man is the one who recognizes his mate. Adam has no problem recognizing that Eve was his missing rib. You do not need to strategically place yourself anywhere. You don't have to help a guy out because he's shy!
Men will do whatever they have to do to get what they truly want. The man in your life should recognize you as the pearl of great price in >his life and be willing to do whatever he must in order to gain your hand. If he is passive about gaining your affections, take it as a sign that he is not interested.
Many a woman's mother has suggested that it is a good idea to marry a man who loves you more than you love him. As cold as that sounds, it actually might be scriptural if you stop to think about it: "We love him because he first loved us" (1 John 4:19). Until then, take the ultimate chill pill. You don't need a bunch of men in your life to make you feel all right about yourself.
You need only one man - your man, the one God has selected to select you. And trust me, the right man at the wrong time can be just as awful as the wrong man at any time. So trust God's timing in this. He is the ultimate matchmaker. Relax, sit pretty and allow yourself to be found.
Again - WAIT until the man voices his intentions. He should take the lead in establishing the relationship. You may have an inkling that he is the one, but God will use the man to set the tone of the relationship. Allow him the opportunity to woo you - this is your first act of submission. Jesus set the standard for all men to follow. They should love us first. And they should lead the relationship.
3. The man in your life should not desire to move into your house, only into your heart . A man who prepares for your future has made his intentions clear. A man who is husband material has the means to take care of a wife. He is a responsible human being who understands he needs to have something to offer. In short, a man should have the means to be a suitable lover for you .
4. Check out his buddies. Everyone knows birds of the same feather flock together, yet most women fail to see the connection between a man and his friends. A man's pals tell you a lot about the person that you haven't seen yet. They reveal things about the guy's character that might be hidden when he is on good behavior. Everyone knows how to put his best foot forward. Don't stay focused on the foot, check out the rest of the body!
5. Check out his relationship with his mother. How does he treat her? This is your preview of how he will treat you. There are lots of men who, because of a negative relationship with their mothers, really don't like women, yet say they do. Unresolved issues between mother and son continue between husband and wife.
6. Remember that a man's family reveals the cloth from which he's cut. Take note and decide whether you want your future with the man in your life to look like his present family situation.
7. Check out the patterns of his life. Do you see repeated cycles of drama in his personal kingdom? Broken relationships? Problems in making commitments --including the job market? Mood swings? Is a problem always someone else's fault?
Does he embrace responsibility or shirk it? Does he keep his promises? Is he a man of good reputation?
Remember all garments look wonderful hanging in the store, but with wear, some begin to unravel. Give yourself time and space to check out the man in your life. Time will always reveal whether or not he is made of the right stuff.
8. Does this man have a vision for his life? Is he running with that vision? Remember, God decided Adam needed help once Adam got busy DOING his assignment. As we saw Adam, a man doesn't need help until he is busy doing what he was created and called to do. I s the man in your life guided by sense of destiny and purpose, or does he just allow life to happen around him? A man who is not certain of his mission can be a most miserable person - and you'll be miserable too if you know where YOU want to go in life.
A man who has vision is not intimidated by a woman whose mission statement is clear. He will be your best ally, cheerleader and assistant because he wants you both to make it! A man who cannot be supportive of your achievements because he is floundering in a sea of uncertainty over his own life is not a healthy partner to have and to hold forever.
Creating dependencies or feelings of obligation is not the way to get the best out of your man. Somewhere along the way, he will resent you and flee from the smothering burden of obligation he associates you with. You want a man who is firmly anchored in his identity in Christ.
Remember, we are looking for a man who will be priest and leader of his home. His first instinct should be to want to cover you, redeem you, and provide for you. Your job is to decide if this is the man God has ordained for you to complement.
9. Complimentary. Do your talents and gifts complement his? Do his gifts, compliment yours? What about your temperaments? Do you see the two of you as an effective team capable of bringing blessing to the lives of those around you? Do your futures mesh? Can you coordinate your gifts in an attractive and effective way?
This is why knowing your purpose is so important. Make sure your hearts >beat for mutual causes. When I go shopping I always consider the fabric, the fit and what I already have in my closet. Will my next purchase be a complimentary addition to what I already have? If I find that I am going to have to buy shoes and matching accessories to go with a new outfit, I leave it right on the rack. It is too expensive a proposition. If the man you meet makes you feel that you need to completely reinvent yourself, something is wrong.
This is where I ask you to consider the relationship in terms of cost.
Is this relationship expensive spiritually, emotional or physically?
Does your longing for a mate make you willing to forfeit who you are in the process? Or does he see you as the gift that you are? The man in your life should consider you a rare find, a priceless jewel-because of you he is getting ready to get blessed big-time! Any relationship that causes you to feel unworthy, unlovely, unacceptable, undesirable or that you have to work for love, is too expensive!
God has called the man to cover, protect and provide not only materially for a woman, but emotionally and spiritually as well. You should be richer in mind, body and spirit for your union with the man of your dreams. The man in your life should make rich deposits into your heart and spirit, not withdrawals.
10. Does he have a healthy love and acceptance of himself?
Make sure the man in your life has taken time to heal from past relationships and has made peace with himself. How he cares for himself is how he will care for you. A man's relationship with God is crucial here. His love for himself will only be as strong as his love for God. This is not something that you can impart. You cannot be his savior or teacher. That is out of spiritual order. In his rightful place as your personal priest, he should be leading you to a richer relationship with Christ. If he is causing you to compromise your faith and destabilize your walk, if he is leading you into sexual sin or causing you to be distracted from your commitment to God, the relationship is too expensive. Offending the Lover of your soul, who promises you eternal love, is too high a fare to pay for a ride that has a limited run. If you and your man can't soar in the Spirit, when the force of your love for another is tested by the pull or gravity of the world, your union will not be able to survive.
So you decide. How much is your life worth? How much is your love worth? You will be able to accept only what you believe you deserve. God himself calculated the worth of your love and decided it was worth
His life. He now pledges you His love for eternity. Yes, Jesus sets the example for all others to follow when He paid a ransom for His bride. Should you expect less from a mortal man? Throughout the Biblical age, men were willing to pay the cost for what they truly desired. The truth of the matter is everyone knows that anything worth having, costs and no one gets a ride in this life for free.
Our prayer: Dear Heavenly Father God,
I confess that I have not always been as careful as I should've been with my heart. From time to time, my desire for love has caused me to leave my heart in the wrong hands. I now commit my heart into Your hands for safekeeping. Please help me to stop being so impulsive with what you deem so precious. As I learn to celebrate Your love for me, let me learn from Your example what a bridegroom should really be like. Help me to never settle for less than what you desire for me. As I
embrace You as the Lover of my soul, keep my affections in the haven of Your own heart. As I rest in Your love, make me more discriminating of those who approach me. I ask that You take over this area of my life. Keep me from those You know would hurt my heart. I invite You to set a hedge around me and keep me from all who would draw me into unfruitful relationships until the day you present me to the mate that You have selected for me. Grant me the discernment to recognize him as he recognizes me. Cleanse me from the temptation to typecast the men I meet according to what I see. Help me to trust in Your knowledge and lean not on my own understanding. I know that You know what is best for me; therefore I yield to Your choice. In Jesus' Name. Amen.
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Post by stillfocused on Jan 14, 2008 15:51:45 GMT -5
This post reminded me of something someone told me. It appears that you can be unequally yoked with a believer as well.
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Post by anointedteacher on Jan 14, 2008 15:53:07 GMT -5
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Post by giantsdodie on Jan 14, 2008 18:37:47 GMT -5
This is the biggest load of dung and people need to stop telling women this stuff...
There are men that LOVE their mothers and treat their wives like total garbage...
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Post by true on Jan 14, 2008 20:36:30 GMT -5
If wife number 3 was truly chosen of God she will be back. She was just scared and hit the ground running lol. But if it's God's will for them to be together they will be together.
Personally I don't want to marry a man who has been married a lot of times. Once maybe twice I am so not into it . More than twice forget about it.... jmo
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.. 
.... Can I get the first Bit? 