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Post by giantsdodie on Nov 15, 2007 9:17:07 GMT -5
Ok these are good questions but I have to state a few things first. Firstly my situation was definitely challenging and very different I believe than what most people would go through. However this is one of the ways that GOD works in my life. A long time ago GOD told me that HE would always do the strange an unusual in my life. Secondly one has to understand that GOD's promises and NEVER contingent on a person. They are contingent upon GOD. He often uses people to affect purpose and destiny but should that person of their own free will choose to disobey GOD it does not stop HIM from being a blessing to you. When most people look at my situation they focus on the goal as marriage and because the marriage didnt happen then something was wrong. However as I have explained many times before that was not what GOD said. GOD said HIS WILL was to teach both individuals a lesson in TRUST. We would had to trust GOD for things in our marriage. She allowed fear and the ungodly counsel of others to undermine her trust in GOD to the point to where she no longer walked in the will of GOD. Because SHE chose to no longer walk in HIS will that makes her unqualified as a mate to someone who is IN the will.. HOW can TWO walk together unless they agree... They cant.. Now keep in mind that GOD told her SEVERAL times in this two year courtship that she was aking mistakes and messing up. God told HER this man is MY PERFECT WILL for YOU. If you mess THIS up.. I am NOT sending you anyone else.. anyone else you get will be YOUR choice.. This is what SHE told me GOD told her... SO she had insturction and warnings from God HIMSELF... I said well GOD we didnt get married so HOW is she going to learn trust.. GOD said she now is learning what happens when you DONT trust GOD... The Trust lesson is being learned..... I said ok thats good now what about me.. GOD said well you are learning how to trust me when you are confused, when you dont understand, whean you are angry, when your heart isbroken WILL YOU STILL TRUST ME  !!!!! God asked will you trust me with that which is closest to you.. YOUR HEART !!!!! See my issue was not the marriage.. The issue was TRUST.... And GOD said because you did MY WILL in this area I am going to bless you DOUBLE for your trouble.. Your wisdom will double.. Your teaching anointing will double.. I will bless you double in your marriage,, double in your buisness... DOUBLE for your Trouble.... hmmm maybe GOD was trying to bless me double ? Now that being said we need to STOP taking every situation we place OURSELVES in and when it doesnt go right asking GOD why did HE allow it as if it was HIS fault it happened. God will allow whatever YOU will allow. Kitty for the record I dont think for one miniute your first situation was GOD at all. God is not going to bring you a pot smoking pornography producer as a potential mate... I wouldnt even go over that one anymore. Just chalk that one up to presumption and move on. After that situation with this woman all kinds of stuff happened. A business it looked like I was going to launch our into dried up, I lost my job and couldnt find work for like 9 months, I was only getting 92.00 a week on unemployment and still had to eat and pay rent... ( and yeah I tithed and Gave offerings !!!!!! ) Why GOD why did you allow that to happen to me.... WILL YOU TRUST ME ?!!!!!!! |
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Post by kitty on Nov 15, 2007 9:24:46 GMT -5
So my next question was to God what was the lesson meant to be to me?
Was I in a place of sin? What I lacking in some area? was I not reading his word enough?
I can honestly say that I think the answer is no to all of those questions. I was reading God's word daily during this experience. I was praying to God about it daily... And during this time period was when God had given me 2 visions that protected me from being harmed in car accidents...
Ultimately the experience has left me with the knowledge that God's way are not my ways...
But to be perfectly honest it has shaken my trust a little bit...
Which is why I have to be perfectly honest and say... That iff the current situation that I am in now... turns out to be false... not of God... Then I can honestly say that I believe I would be foolish to seek a mate thought this process again...
Because if I have laid down my will... If I have asked God not to be deceived... If I have declared to God my love of the truth, my desire not to be out His will...
If I have operated in faith, If the visions that I DIDN'T ASK FOR about a man God is stating IS my husband are false.... Including a confrimation I received about it from a Rev.
Then either one of 2 things has to be true... Either I am clearly not hearing from God...
Or God doesn't honor His promises...
Now of course We all know that God does honor His Word..... I have been standing on Numbers 23:19 for years now... it states that " God is not a man that He should lie...nor the son of man that He should repent. If He has said it then shall He not do it? Or hath He spoken and shall He not make it good?"
So if this is false... then could it be that this just isn't the way God expect me to find a husband?
Kitty
To this very day I can't really understand what the purpose of my counterfeit experience was...
Was it a test to see if I would still trust Him after that experience?
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Post by Nikkol on Nov 15, 2007 10:24:30 GMT -5
The "simple" (but not so simple) answer is Yes. I believe that everything in our life happens for a reason. Can God direct us to a particular person and the end seem not to go according to plan? Yes. The same way God told a prophet to tell the people certain things and also told him that they still won't hear or obey.
So although we are questioning "Would God......", I am wondering if there's a different question that we should be asking instead...
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Post by livinganewlife on Nov 15, 2007 11:05:15 GMT -5
Kitty my heart goes out to you this is so my story too, (this is looong so bear with me) Oh trust me I know exactly how you feel…… I don’t know if I started this thread or if you started it but at any rate I do honestly believe that we can “over” spiritualize the marriage selection process and as a result we end up with many single women disgruntled, frustrated and losing faith in God….. Yes it will shake your faith when you honestly believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that God has told you that “Johnny” is your husband…… Kitty, I feel your pain and understand wholeheartedly how you feel because I have been there and have been at a place in my life where I just stopped praying to God about relationships because every time I prayed I would receive confirmation from God and in the end experienced heartache and rejection over and over again…… It got to a place to where I was asking and comparing my walk to others trying to see what areas in my life needed purging and what process did I need to go through in order to receive my Husband; asking God daily what is so wrong with me that I am unable to receive the love that so many others seem to receive without ever praying about it…. Many of my friends had married and had good marriages (so it seem) without ever praying, without ever going before the Lord fasting and consecrating themselves to God before marriage…and on the flip side my other girlfriends along with myself were praying, fasting, studying, and dedicating our single lives to God without seeing any manifestation in the area of marriage or relationships. I just gave up on the entire idea of seeking a mate the way I was seeking one…Kitty, you are correct if the relationship you are in now doesn’t work than there is something incorrect with your approach….. and when I met my husband I wasn’t seeking…I stopped praying, fasting and laying up before the Lord because one thing I found out in this process is that if I am the woman than it is up to me to submit to my husband and to the direction that God has given him…… Sometimes when we as women pray, fast and consecrate for these relationships many times we are operating in a spirit of witchcraft (manipulation). Many times we want God to manipulate these relationships and turn them around to work in our favor (desires) and not according to his will…..
It is really simple and once I let it go and really turned it over to God and left it there the Lord blessed me…… I didn’t have to fast, pray and lay all out (for 40 days and 40 nights) in order to recognize that my husband was the man for me….. I went back to the book of Genesis and read thoroughly the plan of marriage God set from the beginning…. Adam heart was pricked when he saw Eve there was not a lot of preparation for Eve (Eve was prepared when she was presented to Adam) {we're not talking about why she ate the apple if she was so whole  } once she was presented to Adam….. Another thing that is very important is the language Adam used once he realized that Eve was his wife… Adam understood that Eve was his wife and his language changed….he acknowledged first that this is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh….All Eve had to do was accept and submit to what he was saying….. To wrap this up; once my husband realized that I was the woman for him….. I then begin to pray and ask the Lord was / is he the one for me…… and the Lord gave me a simple YES he is the one….. Spiritually my husband met the qualifications (he was Saved, Sanctified, and Pentecostal believer in the Word of God)…. Physically my husband met my qualifications (he was pleasing to the eye, emotionally stable and financially stable to be the man of our home). I am serious it was as simple as the Lord saying does he meet your requirements…... Let me say that once I submitted everything over to God my desires changed no longer did I want the man that I had to pray and labor over in order to make our relationship work (not to say don’t pray) but not the emotional prayers I used to pray. My strongest desire was that I wanted my husband to fall in line according to God’s plan for marriage and my husband stepped to me that way! |
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Post by kitty on Nov 15, 2007 12:18:50 GMT -5
Hey Guys,
I appreciate all of you here allowing me to vent my thoughts out loud... You all have no idea just how much that helps me! I love you all God bless you all!
Living... thanks for sharing your experience. It helps me to try to be as objective about this whole matter as I can. The bottom line is that I'm just about at the end of this process... In just a matter of weeks I will know for sure without a doubt whether or not this is God.
Last night I went through my prayer journals and re-read a book by John Bevere called, " Thus said the Lord?" It was by reading this book that I was seeking answers of how not to be spiritually deceived... The book stated that people were deceived because the didn't have a love for the truth.
So this second time... I told God that I had no desire for anything false... I declared my love of the truth and desire to be in God's will. It is my belief that above all other requests, that God would honor this one... My desire to know the truth and to be within His will.
Soooo... If it turns out that's not the case this time... and guys let me tell you... This is the last leg of a race that I have been running for 4 years!!! I had so much to do in the process to get to this point between school, passing exams, dealing with the death of family members, fight with the IRS(this was reallllly scary!) packing up an apt I lived in for 14 years, moving to another state, starting a new program. I have been operating in faith the whole time....
Now with all the other areas in my life... Everything adds up. This is the one area in question! But I promise... If this isn't of God... I can't in good conscience do this again...
Kitty
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Post by kitty on Nov 15, 2007 12:26:23 GMT -5
Nikkol,
You stated that you thought that maybe there is another question that maybe we should be asking? Would question would that be?
Kitty
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Post by giantsdodie on Nov 15, 2007 12:36:43 GMT -5
The "simple" (but not so simple) answer is Yes. I believe that everything in our life happens for a reason. Can God direct us to a particular person and the end seem not to go according to plan? Yes. The same way God told a prophet to tell the people certain things and also told him that they still won't hear or obey. So although we are questioning "Would God......", I am wondering if there's a different question that we should be asking instead... Again I think the issue here is that we are placing a lot of the responsibility and in all honesty a lot of the blame at GOD's feet. A lot of times we move presumptuously. We move without getting confirmation from the Lord ( sometimes not even knowing what a confirmation truly is ). Sometimes we are lead by our emotions and our desires. Worst case scenario, sometimes we are led by our FEARS.. You cannot be led by fear. I often see people led more by what they fear, than their faith. Im afraid to be alone. Im afraid I wont find anyone. Im afraid Ill be too old to have children.. Im afraid no one will like me.. etc etc etc... And where do we get this " false gospel" that God wont allow us to be placed in a difficult or challenging situation so HE can reveal Himself to us in a whole NEW way ?? Lets take God's servants Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. God didnt deliver them from being arrested and brought before the court. God didnt deliver them when they were bound. God didnt deliver them when they turned the furnance on. God didnt deliver them when the furnace was made seven times hotter. God didnt deliver them when they picked them up. God didnt deliver them when they threw them in the fire. God delivered them when THEY WERE IN THE FIRE !!!!.... I believe one of the biggest mistakes we make is we give God OUR conditions that we want and need met but we dont ask Him what HIS are. |
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Post by Nikkol on Nov 15, 2007 12:36:54 GMT -5
Nikkol, You stated that you thought that maybe there is another question that maybe we should be asking? Would question would that be? Kitty I'm not sure. Actually thinking about it now, I'm not thinking that it should be a "question" at all but rather a statement saying "Where you lead me, I'll follow".... I don't know if we can rationalize everything that happens. (used bold for that is what I'm emphasizing on this point) I don't think that you should perse "do" anything... but if you just follow where God is leading, you can't go wrong..... We can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens us.... that is where our dependence and strength has to lie..... and that applies to all areas of our life.... not just in a mate. Because sometimes even in ministry, based on what goes on, you could say those same words..... |
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Post by giantsdodie on Nov 15, 2007 13:22:45 GMT -5
Nikkol, You stated that you thought that maybe there is another question that maybe we should be asking? Would question would that be? Kitty I'm not sure. Actually thinking about it now, I'm not thinking that it should be a "question" at all but rather a statement saying "Where you lead me, I'll follow".... I don't know if we can rationalize everything that happens. (used bold for that is what I'm emphasizing on this point) I don't think that you should perse "do" anything... but if you just follow where God is leading, you can't go wrong..... We can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens us.... that is where our dependence and strength has to lie..... and that applies to all areas of our life.... not just in a mate. Because sometimes even in ministry, based on what goes on, you could say those same words..... I think the question is... Lord what is your will |
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Post by Beulah5 on Nov 16, 2007 9:48:02 GMT -5
Amen!!
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Post by anointedteacher on Nov 16, 2007 16:52:37 GMT -5
The "simple" (but not so simple) answer is Yes. I believe that everything in our life happens for a reason. Can God direct us to a particular person and the end seem not to go according to plan? Yes. The same way God told a prophet to tell the people certain things and also told him that they still won't hear or obey. So although we are questioning "Would God......", I am wondering if there's a different question that we should be asking instead... Again I think the issue here is that we are placing a lot of the responsibility and in all honesty a lot of the blame at GOD's feet. A lot of times we move presumptuously. We move without getting confirmation from the Lord ( sometimes not even knowing what a confirmation truly is ). Sometimes we are lead by our emotions and our desires. Worst case scenario, sometimes we are led by our FEARS.. You cannot be led by fear. I often see people led more by what they fear, than their faith. Im afraid to be alone. Im afraid I wont find anyone. Im afraid Ill be too old to have children.. Im afraid no one will like me.. etc etc etc... And where do we get this " false gospel" that God wont allow us to be placed in a difficult or challenging situation so HE can reveal Himself to us in a whole NEW way ?? Lets take God's servants Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. God didnt deliver them from being arrested and brought before the court. God didnt deliver them when they were bound. God didnt deliver them when they turned the furnance on. God didnt deliver them when the furnace was made seven times hotter. God didnt deliver them when they picked them up. God didnt deliver them when they threw them in the fire. God delivered them when THEY WERE IN THE FIRE !!!!.... I believe one of the biggest mistakes we make is we give God OUR conditions that we want and need met but we dont ask Him what HIS are. This need to be posted on Juanita Bynum's Thread.... |
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!!!!! God asked will you trust me with that which is closest to you.. YOUR HEART 
} once she was presented to Adam…..