How old....

[nina2]

I just wanted to ask the question:

How old is too old to get married?

What do you think? Do you think that there is a virtual "line" beyond which people should not even think about getting married?

At what age do you think that line should be drawn?

Why?

[anointedteacher]

120.... the person should be dead

[giantsdodie]

Marriage IMO for the child of God is about the will of God being fulfilled in ones life. One is never too old to fulfill the will of God.

[Jasmine]

I second that comment giant. One is never too old to fulfil the will of God.

[nina2]

OK......

Soooooo.... Now, that we know the end, can we go back to the beginning? ;-)

There were several reasons for me to ask that question. Some general, some more personal. The fact is that society at large, if we let it, will tell us what to do in every area of our life. And, as always, we are in the world, we are not of the world. That’s the absolute. Now, can we honestly say that none of it affects us?

One of the areas of life that has been twisted the most by all the so called experts out there is the issue of relationships. Obviously, they are not doing a very good job because it does not seem to get better, not for young people, not for middle age people, not for “older” people, and, sadly enough, not even for the same experts who most of the time end up in the tabloids themselves for resounding failure in their own private issues...

I also asked because sometimes – maybe it’s just me feeling that way – the Bible is still read like a “fairy tale”, stories that just make us “dream”. We read about a man or woman of God in the Bible, and we bypass everything it “took” for them to get where they got, including marriage and children...

And, I believe that age is relevant. It is relevant biblically also because a lot of things are not necessarily approached with all the factors needed. For example Jacob.... For some reason, it seems that he is always seen, through it all, as being a lot younger than he actually was when some events happened in his life. According to some serious writings, by the time he got to his uncle, Laban, and saw Rachel for the first time, he was already in his sixties and she was, well, what we would consider a “child”. Add to that that it took him forteen years to actually marry her....

Then, there is the question: why do older people get married? Which begs for the question what do we consider older today, and then, how old is too old?
Let’s face it, when so called “older people” get married, once the ones who actually don’t frown on it are done with all the “they are so cute...” we all know what the next thing is, often not actually said, but probably thought, because, after a certain “age” sex is not supposed to be as big a part of the marriage picture, period. In addition, after a certain age, the “be fruitful and multiply” commandment certainly can’t be fulfilled, at least through natural means.

So, I understand what you said about the ultimate purpose of marriage.
I still have the questions... Should older people get married? If they do, why do they?

[Jasmine]

Jul 24, 2008 11:15:21 GMT -5 nina2 said:

So, I understand what you said about the ultimate purpose of marriage.
I still have the questions... Should older people get married? If they do, why do they?

1. Yes, they should.

2. My opinion, companionship, and not being alone, or even dying alone. To love and be loved is a beautiful experience, and people want that experience.

[livinganewlife]

Jul 24, 2008 14:57:01 GMT -5 Jasmine said:

Jul 24, 2008 11:15:21 GMT -5 nina2 said:

So, I understand what you said about the ultimate purpose of marriage.
I still have the questions... Should older people get married? If they do, why do they?

1. Yes, they should.

2. My opinion, companionship, and not being alone, or even dying alone. To love and be loved is a beautiful experience, and people want that experience.

I second that!

[And Such Were Some Of You]

I am also with Giants on this one - one is never to old for marriage.

[giantsdodie]

There were several reasons for me to ask that question. Some general, some more personal. The fact is that society at large, if we let it, will tell us what to do in every area of our life. And, as always, we are in the world, we are not of the world. That’s the absolute. Now, can we honestly say that none of it affects us?

The key statement you made here is " if WE let it " Society doesnt affect the way I think or what I believe. That is reserved in my life strictly for GOD and HIS Word.

And, I believe that age is relevant. [/qupte]

Only because you make it so. Many people do because they limit their understanding of marriage to " having children ' or " having sex " Old people are too old to have children and in our minds old people shouldnt have sex either cause society just sees that as nasty. Somebody should have told Abraham and Sarah to cut it out then. But then again sex is about a lot more than having children and physical pleasure.

For example Jacob.... For some reason, it seems that he is always seen, through it all, as being a lot younger than he actually was when some events happened in his life.

While I dont know for sure how old Jacon was Moses was 80 years old before he started his ministry...

Caleb was 40 years old when he spied out the land and received his promise from God 45 years later.

So again age has nothing to do with fulfilling destiny and purpose.

Why do people get married. People get married because they love each other. People get married because of their desire to be together the rest of their lives. People get married to fulfill the will destiny and purpose of God in their lives. People get married to affect DESTINY.

We really really really need to break out of our small mindedness in areas where marriage is concerned and begin to see GOD's will purpose and intention.

I didnt get married just because I love my wife. I got married because it was GOD's WILL. I understand the purpose behing WHY we are married.

For example in my wife's family it is very matriarchal. Most of the women are in bad marriages or they are single mothers. This extends back through several generations.

God said to us. THE CURSE STOPS WITH YOU.. God said He was stopping the curse of bad marriage or no marriage off the women in the family with us. He said when they see what HE will do in our lives that the women and especially the younger women will say " I want what she has " They will WAIT until marriage to give themselves to a man ( my wife was a virgin when we are married and her sister is 36+ years old and still a virgin bless God ). God said they will desire to have a TRUE man of GOD in their life.

Now God also said that many of the women in their family are saved. Yet the men are not. God siad he was changing that through me. God said you are as " manly " as the rest of them. You like Sports, Fishing, etc etc yet you Love Jesus. God said I am going to show the men through you that being saved doesnt make you a " punk ".

Now as for my family. God said look at her family.. The saved numbers of her family keep groiwing every year. My family by and large is not saved. God said they have learned how to evangelize within their family and to raise their children in the fear and admonition of the Lord. They hold prayer vigils and fast over the unsaved family members. I will teach you how to do this for YOUR family through them. so that YOU and your HOUSEHOLD may be saved...

God also said that He was going to re-establish the patriiarchs in my family line through me. I am the ONLY saved Holy Ghost filled person carrying my family name. God still has a will for my family name in the earth. I know I will have at least three children and that of those three at least two will be sons. Their names will be Isaiah James and Judah Brian. I received Isaiah James when I asked the Lord about my sons names. The tradition in opur family is that the oldest male child receives the grandfathers first name as his middle name. God said yes you can keep that tradition call him Isaiah James. I asked the Lord the signifigance of that name. James is the english verson of Jacob which means trickster or supplanter. I didnt like that too much. Isaiah means righteousness or one who calls righteousness. God said because Isaiah comes first your sons name literally means.. One who calls unrighteousness into righteousness.... He is the evangelist.

My second sons name is Judah Brian. Judah means praise the Lord. Brian means strength or power. His name literally means In the Praises of the Lord there is Strength. Amazingly musical talent runs in my family. Both my mother and father were gospel singers, I used to DJ and have been trained as an audio engineer and I know I will write and produce music ( I can sing too but I dont like singing )

Interesting my name literally translates to Strong Desire, Strong Will, or Strong Faith.

Now that not even talking about the ministry of the Lord Jesus Christ through us to the community and church at large. Thats just what God revealed personally.

When my wife and I got engaged I asked her how she sees herself along side me minstry wise. She said well this is kind of how I see it.

I see you as the tornado that comes along and rips up the town and keeps moving, and I am the Red Cross that brings the coffee donuts and the blankets.. Which I found funny because thats one of the things I am called to do. I am called to uproot, tear up, tear down, turn over and break up fallow ground. However nuturing isnt my strong point. That however IS my wife's strong point. She saw this clearly.

Thats GOD meshing ministry together through marriage.

Who is too old to fulfill the will of God ?

I say NO ONE...

[Jasmine]

Jul 26, 2008 8:04:18 GMT -5 giantsdodie said:

There were several reasons for me to ask that question. Some general, some more personal. The fact is that society at large, if we let it, will tell us what to do in every area of our life. And, as always, we are in the world, we are not of the world. That’s the absolute. Now, can we honestly say that none of it affects us?

The key statement you made here is " if WE let it " Society doesnt affect the way I think or what I believe. That is reserved in my life strictly for GOD and HIS Word.

And, I believe that age is relevant. [/qupte]

Only because you make it so. Many people do because they limit their understanding of marriage to " having children ' or " having sex " Old people are too old to have children and in our minds old people shouldnt have sex either cause society just sees that as nasty. Somebody should have told Abraham and Sarah to cut it out then. But then again sex is about a lot more than having children and physical pleasure.

For example Jacob.... For some reason, it seems that he is always seen, through it all, as being a lot younger than he actually was when some events happened in his life.

While I dont know for sure how old Jacon was Moses was 80 years old before he started his ministry...

Caleb was 40 years old when he spied out the land and received his promise from God 45 years later.

So again age has nothing to do with fulfilling destiny and purpose.

Why do people get married. People get married because they love each other. People get married because of their desire to be together the rest of their lives. People get married to fulfill the will destiny and purpose of God in their lives. People get married to affect DESTINY.

We really really really need to break out of our small mindedness in areas where marriage is concerned and begin to see GOD's will purpose and intention.

I didnt get married just because I love my wife. I got married because it was GOD's WILL. I understand the purpose behing WHY we are married.

For example in my wife's family it is very matriarchal. Most of the women are in bad marriages or they are single mothers. This extends back through several generations.

God said to us. THE CURSE STOPS WITH YOU.. God said He was stopping the curse of bad marriage or no marriage off the women in the family with us. He said when they see what HE will do in our lives that the women and especially the younger women will say " I want what she has " They will WAIT until marriage to give themselves to a man ( my wife was a virgin when we are married and her sister is 36+ years old and still a virgin bless God ). God said they will desire to have a TRUE man of GOD in their life.

Now God also said that many of the women in their family are saved. Yet the men are not. God siad he was changing that through me. God said you are as " manly " as the rest of them. You like Sports, Fishing, etc etc yet you Love Jesus. God said I am going to show the men through you that being saved doesnt make you a " punk ".

Now as for my family. God said look at her family.. The saved numbers of her family keep groiwing every year. My family by and large is not saved. God said they have learned how to evangelize within their family and to raise their children in the fear and admonition of the Lord. They hold prayer vigils and fast over the unsaved family members. I will teach you how to do this for YOUR family through them. so that YOU and your HOUSEHOLD may be saved...

God also said that He was going to re-establish the patriiarchs in my family line through me. I am the ONLY saved Holy Ghost filled person carrying my family name. God still has a will for my family name in the earth. I know I will have at least three children and that of those three at least two will be sons. Their names will be Isaiah James and Judah Brian. I received Isaiah James when I asked the Lord about my sons names. The tradition in opur family is that the oldest male child receives the grandfathers first name as his middle name. God said yes you can keep that tradition call him Isaiah James. I asked the Lord the signifigance of that name. James is the english verson of Jacob which means trickster or supplanter. I didnt like that too much. Isaiah means righteousness or one who calls righteousness. God said because Isaiah comes first your sons name literally means.. One who calls unrighteousness into righteousness.... He is the evangelist.

My second sons name is Judah Brian. Judah means praise the Lord. Brian means strength or power. His name literally means In the Praises of the Lord there is Strength. Amazingly musical talent runs in my family. Both my mother and father were gospel singers, I used to DJ and have been trained as an audio engineer and I know I will write and produce music ( I can sing too but I dont like singing )

Interesting my name literally translates to Strong Desire, Strong Will, or Strong Faith.

Now that not even talking about the ministry of the Lord Jesus Christ through us to the community and church at large. Thats just what God revealed personally.

When my wife and I got engaged I asked her how she sees herself along side me minstry wise. She said well this is kind of how I see it.

I see you as the tornado that comes along and rips up the town and keeps moving, and I am the Red Cross that brings the coffee donuts and the blankets.. Which I found funny because thats one of the things I am called to do. I am called to uproot, tear up, tear down, turn over and break up fallow ground. However nuturing isnt my strong point. That however IS my wife's strong point. She saw this clearly.

Thats GOD meshing ministry together through marriage.

Who is too old to fulfill the will of God ?

I say NO ONE...

I have just one small observation on a statement you made, however I earnestly agree with your post.

Why do people get married. People get married because they love each other. People get married because of their desire to be together the rest of their lives. People get married to fulfill the will destiny and purpose of God in their lives. People get married to affect DESTINY.

We really really really need to break out of our small mindedness in areas where marriage is concerned and begin to see GOD's will purpose and intention.

Not everyome see's God will, purpose and intention, with marriage. As christians, yes, we understand that there it's more than 2 people coming together, to live happily ever after in eternal bliss. We understand that there is purpose, and destiny connected to the individual you are going to marry.

However people who do not have a relationship with God, do not know this. So in reality people get married because, they want to live forever with the person of their choice, They want to be loved.

even with the old people.

In a sense its not small mindedness, as they don't know God. If they knew God then, they would understand the greater picture.

[giantsdodie]

Not everyome see's God will, purpose and intention, with marriage. As christians, yes, we understand that there it's more than 2 people coming together, to live happily ever after in eternal bliss. We understand that there is purpose, and destiny connected to the individual you are going to marry.

However people who do not have a relationship with God, do not know this. So in reality people get married because, they want to live forever with the person of their choice, They want to be loved.

even with the old people.

In a sense its not small mindedness, as they don't know God. If they knew God then, they would understand the greater picture.

True but I am not addressing this as an unbeliever or even to unbelievers.

[nina2]

“Why do people get married. People get married because they love each other. People get married because of their desire to be together the rest of their lives. People get married to fulfill the will destiny and purpose of God in their lives. People get married to affect DESTINY.”

“We really really really need to break out of our small mindedness in areas where marriage is concerned and begin to see GOD's will purpose and intention.”

“Who is too old to fulfill the will of God ?

I say NO ONE...”

“The key statement you made here is " if WE let it " Society doesnt affect the way I think or what I believe. That is reserved in my life strictly for GOD and HIS Word.”

Just for the record, in the key statement, the keyword was IF :-) I am not swayed in any way in those areas either....

You say:

“We really really really need to break out of our small mindedness in areas where marriage is concerned and begin to see GOD's will purpose and intention.”

So, what is stopping “We” from breaking out of the narrow concepts used so far to define marriage and take it to the real level where it belongs first?

My understanding is that the persons we refer to so far as ‘older people’ have “naturally” the right approach towards marriage. Or, at least, they should...
I say naturally because some issues are still relevant, but no longer priorities. Imho, that too should put them in the right position, with God, and each other, to be more aware and willing to fullfill the will of God.
Also, at that stage, there are maybe less distractions (?) hindering them from stepping into destiny and purpose...

Being older – and hopefully wiser – people should enter a marriage for the right reasons – love, togetherness, lasting relationship - and with a clear vision of the future that God grants them.

Don’t those same principles apply for younger people getting married?

Should not they be told more about that dimension of marriage?

[giantsdodie]

Jul 27, 2008 0:42:21 GMT -5 nina2 said:

“Why do people get married. People get married because they love each other. People get married because of their desire to be together the rest of their lives. People get married to fulfill the will destiny and purpose of God in their lives. People get married to affect DESTINY.”

“We really really really need to break out of our small mindedness in areas where marriage is concerned and begin to see GOD's will purpose and intention.”

“Who is too old to fulfill the will of God ?

I say NO ONE...”

“The key statement you made here is " if WE let it " Society doesnt affect the way I think or what I believe. That is reserved in my life strictly for GOD and HIS Word.”

Just for the record, in the key statement, the keyword was IF :-) I am not swayed in any way in those areas either....

You say:

“We really really really need to break out of our small mindedness in areas where marriage is concerned and begin to see GOD's will purpose and intention.”

So, what is stopping “We” from breaking out of the narrow concepts used so far to define marriage and take it to the real level where it belongs first?

My understanding is that the persons we refer to so far as ‘older people’ have “naturally” the right approach towards marriage. Or, at least, they should...
I say naturally because some issues are still relevant, but no longer priorities. Imho, that too should put them in the right position, with God, and each other, to be more aware and willing to fullfill the will of God.
Also, at that stage, there are maybe less distractions (?) hindering them from stepping into destiny and purpose...

Being older – and hopefully wiser – people should enter a marriage for the right reasons – love, togetherness, lasting relationship - and with a clear vision of the future that God grants them.

Don’t those same principles apply for younger people getting married?

Should not they be told more about that dimension of marriage?

can u clarify what you are asking.. im not getting the gist...

[nina2]

Thanks Giants for bearing with me..

I took a turn, since the starting question is: how old is too old to get married?

This is where I took that turn, when you mentioned:

"Why do people get married. People get married because they love each other. People get married because of their desire to be together the rest of their lives. People get married to fulfill the will destiny and purpose of God in their lives. People get married to affect DESTINY."

"We really really really need to break out of our small mindedness in areas where marriage is concerned and begin to see GOD's will purpose and intention."

My understanding of what you are saying here is that it applies to any marriage, young and not so young.

However, when it comes to the not so young, having reached a certain age, it seems reasonable to think that "candidates to marriage" should have their priorities in order when it comes to entering a marriage relationship re what you mentioned above: "begin to see GOD's will purpose and intention" and "People get married to affect destiny".

What really stood out to me is the second part of what you said:
"People get married to affect destiny".

That's why I asked that last question. Because it seems to me that often - and I might be mistaken - younger people, singles, engaged, newlyweds, have been told/taught a lot about marriage, and it's not necessarily that part - purpose and destiny - that has really been stressed, emphasized and put at the top, let alone understood.

Actually, some couples with a few years of marriage might be seriously slipping and sliding in their relationship for lack of vision at that level in their marriage, lack of understanding of what is actually being "pro-created" in and through a marriage.

So, if it is so critical and vital to the strength of a marriage (and imho it is) why is it not taught that way, period?

[giantsdodie]

Jul 28, 2008 0:00:39 GMT -5 nina2 said:

Thanks Giants for bearing with me..

I took a turn, since the starting question is: how old is too old to get married?

This is where I took that turn, when you mentioned:

"Why do people get married. People get married because they love each other. People get married because of their desire to be together the rest of their lives. People get married to fulfill the will destiny and purpose of God in their lives. People get married to affect DESTINY."

"We really really really need to break out of our small mindedness in areas where marriage is concerned and begin to see GOD's will purpose and intention."

My understanding of what you are saying here is that it applies to any marriage, young and not so young.

However, when it comes to the not so young, having reached a certain age, it seems reasonable to think that "candidates to marriage" should have their priorities in order when it comes to entering a marriage relationship re what you mentioned above: "begin to see GOD's will purpose and intention" and "People get married to affect destiny".

What really stood out to me is the second part of what you said:
"People get married to affect destiny".

That's why I asked that last question. Because it seems to me that often - and I might be mistaken - younger people, singles, engaged, newlyweds, have been told/taught a lot about marriage, and it's not necessarily that part - purpose and destiny - that has really been stressed, emphasized and put at the top, let alone understood.

Actually, some couples with a few years of marriage might be seriously slipping and sliding in their relationship for lack of vision at that level in their marriage, lack of understanding of what is actually being "pro-created" in and through a marriage.

So, if it is so critical and vital to the strength of a marriage (and imho it is) why is it not taught that way, period?

I will say this. I tend to speak from the perspective of a believer in Christ. Folks in the world get married nad have good marriages by the grace of God. Christians get married without consukting God and some have good marriages by the grace of God. However I am of the persuasion that we should seek the highest goal as Christans and seek GOD for His perfect will in every situation.

We often have a skewed view of what is taught and what is not taught in the Body of Christ.

We either only know what is being taught in our local churches or what we see on TV. Television ministry is only a small snippett of the ministry that goes on in a church.

My local church has had at various times a single womens ministry, womens fellowship, mens fellowship, childrens church, youth (14-20) luncheon, wives fellowship, men of destiny, daughters of virtue as well as beginner and advanced bible study, prayer night as well as NUMEROUS workshops such as Spiritual Protocol, Prophecy, Financial Deliverance, Spiritual Warfare, Holy Spirit workshop and many others.

I didnt get my understanding of marriage at my local church, although our asst pastor does a marriage workshop.

Most of mine came on my own. When the Lord began to speak to me about marriage I realized I didnt have the understanding I needed in that area to walk into fulfillment. I did have the blessing of having parents who had a very good marriage for 36 years until my mother passed away.

But even with that I needed to study. I began to study the Word on marriage. I then studied Jesus and His relationship to the church because husbands are told to love their wives as Christ loved the church. I began to get the understanding that marriage was a covenant. So then I studied covenants. I began to see that certain marriages in the Word of God were for the purpose of destiny and the Will of God being accomplished in the earth.

I got tapes from various ministries. TD Jakes had a good series on marriage, Apostle Louis Greenup visited a church I belonged to several times and spoke on marriage. I read some books whose titles I cant remember at this time.

I said all that to say what....

Many times we as saints say.. " How come this isnt being taught "

The reality I have found is that often times IT IS being taught or HAS been taught but that WE are responsible for the research.

One thing I learned as a young child. My dad taught me,

" Dont ever wait for anyone to hand anything to you. if you want to learn something. get the information yourself "

The Bible says..

" if any man lack wisdom let him ask GOD who giveth liberally and upbraideth not "

I told God I dont have the wisdom needed to walk into this thing called marriage...

GOD provided and hasnt STOPPED providing....

I just learned a buncha stuff the last two months since my wife has been visiting family about my marriage and things I need to do MUCH better in my relationship with MY wife...

See GOD has taught me a LOT about marriage... That was to get me prepared FOR marriage...

Now GOD is teaching me a lot about me and the PARTICULAR woman I married... so I can have a Successful bounyiful marriage....

Everlearning....

Now being a certain age DOESNT necessarily mean we have our act together or our priorities in order cause I am SURE we all know some older silly folks.

Purpose and destiny is taught. Its taught A LOT. I can turn on the TV right now and find probablt 2-3 ministers teaching on it.

I will give you an example. Our Asst Pastor teaches much of the womens minstry. She has taught the women of God repeatedly in our church. Get to KNOW the will of GOD for YOUR life. Start walking in it... If a man shows up that DOESNT line up with the Will of God for YOUR LIFE.. dismiss that.... If He DOES.. PRAY !!!!

Simple instructions... yet there are countless women in our church who STILL havent sought God about THEIR purpose and destiny. We have had teaching upon teaching about destiny...

He had had The Call and the Mandate message, The Hour of Fulfillment teaching. The Dreamwalker Series, How to War with your Prophecy, Jesus is a Sure Thing... and on and on and on...

Some have embraced.. MOST havent....

Why is it because of lack of teaching.. Nope.. lack of APPLICATION...

Also we have failure to follow INSTRUCTION...

AP ( thats what we call her.. short for Asst Pastor ) is also a Prophetess.

She had a single womens ministry meeting with the single women and told them that the LORD wanted them to begin to pray for their spouses. She said that the LORD said He would begin to show them the TYPE ( NOT THE ACTUAL MAN ) of man that HE has prepared for them and they need to prayand get ready to receive.

They were told SPECIFICALLY.. NONE OF YOUR HUSBANDS ARE IN THE CHURCH ( meaning our local church ) RIGHT NOW.... Now this was the Word of the Lord....

SEVERAL women ( which we found out later ) believed that the Lord told them they would marry the House Prophet who is single... but um.. He is in the church.. so wouldnt he be disqualified and why would GOD tell SEVERAL women the same thing ? and it was prophesied in the CHURCH openly that HIS WIFE is actually on the West Coast and that he would meet her in his ministry travels....

Other women came back with another single brother in the church who was very very very young in the Lord and SOME of these women were like 12-15 years his ELDER !!!! ( not that GOD cant do that.. it just wasnt GOD )

SO sometimes its not what we are being taught. Its what we apply and the instructions we follow.

And even if NO ONE is teaching....

The Holy Ghost knows ALL THINGS..and teaches ALL THINGS....