Dating

[abundanceofpraise]

Praise the Lord Saints......... I wanted to start another thread about dating. What are your thoughts and views on Christian Dating............ Also I would like for you all to share some Ideas on things to do on a date............So please share your thoughts...........

Love
Jessica

[giantsdodie]

why did the dating banner pop up when I read this LOL !!!!

sugardaddie.com.... daaaaaaaaaaaaaaag ;D

[Jasmine]

lolol giants!

[abundanceofpraise]

Anybody have any suggestions? Any advice???

[giantsdodie]

Personally I dont think Christians should date at all. That however is not the popular view.

OH and Happy Birthday by the way.

[nina2]

Personally, I think that, today, the entire concept of dating is wrong, period, whether Christian or not.

It might be a little extreme to say not to date at all (Hi Giants! ) but it seems to me that dating has taken a meaning that is not a very positive one.

Dating used to mean going out socially. In other words: having fun. I'm not talking about playing games with people. Just, go out, get to know people in general, even if it's one one one, it does not have to be more than that from the jump.

Maybe I'm not looking at those things from the right angle either, because I actually happen to believe that it is possible for a man and a woman to be friends.... which means that they can actually enjoy each other's company, without anything else lurking in the back of their mind or anywhere else for that matter.

If a person is attracted to somebody and goes on a date, it's already setting up the stage for other factors to come into play, including disappointment. Maybe it should be called something else

Most of us would be shocked at the thought of arranged marriages, yet, it is very trendy and acceptable to go and join a dating service?

There are stages in getting to know somebody, in any context, not just romantically. I understand that everything goes faster these days, the "microwave society" as they call it. Well, you go into "microwave knowing somebody" you're going to have a "microwave type relationship"!

[abundanceofpraise]

awwww thanks Giant for the B-day Greeting.........
Well if Dating is wrong than whats the aproppriate way to get to know somebody!!!!
Im a lil confused, Nobody really ever talks about this in the church

Love
Jessica

[nina2]

I'm not a relationship expert so, this is just what I think: the appropriate way to know somebody is to take the time to know somebody.
It is important to find out if you like somebody, first. Whatever it leads to, whether friendship or other type of relationship, how can you figure a relationship has a future of any kind if you don't even know that you like the person?
I'm not saying that we can't be attracted to somebody. That's the most obvious, looks, style, whatever somebody responds to... And it is important, but it's not all of it.
So, no problem, if someone wants to know you better, or vice versa. But there's no need to be ten steps ahead of yourself or of the other person. And, I would dare to say that the same things happen whether a Christian or not.
And, by the way, a "date" does not have to be always in the evening. What's wrong with having a lunch date? I guess that puts a twist in staying in the light... lol
I think it's all in how you approach it, your state of mind.

[giantsdodie]

I dont believe in dating. I believe that we should seek GOD for a mate and allow GOD to reveal His plan and His choice for our lives. I encourage people to follow Paul's instructions to Timothy. Treat the young women as sisters and the elder women as mothers. Keep that relationship until GOD reveals His choice and His plan.

The problem I see with dating is that it often sets up challenging situation and I am not talking about the sin of fornication per se ( although that does occur unfortunately for some ). I am talking about things where one person like the other person more than that person likes them. I have found this leads to heartache and soul ties which GOD now has to work on to heal the person from.

The other problem I have is, if we are TRULY honest ,especially those of us who had a lifestyle before JESUS mercifully interrupted it with Salvation, we would realize that as far as relatiobships go the majority of us make POOR choices. The scripture tells us to acknowledge GOD in all our ways and He WILL direct our path.

Unfortunately when it comes to topics like dating, we tend to put GOD on the backburner.

[abundanceofpraise]

hummmmmm this is very interesting nobody seems to beleive in dating
wow I personally don't think its wrong, how else are going to get to know somebody.

[nina2]

There are different ways to "know" a person. So, there is a need to define exactly what is meant by saying "know somebody"....

-If you catch the same bus every day, and the same person sits by you every day, would you say that we know that person?

- Even if you have casual conversation with that person every day and are courteous to each other, would you say that you know that person?

- If you just "enjoy" being around a person, because of what you perceive of their personality in a certain environment - school, job, church - would you say that you know that person?

What I am trying to say is that you (general) should already know a person before going on a date with that person. Again, today, the purpose of dating has taken a different - and very narrow - meaning, the first one not being simply to get to know somebody....

If you choose to go ahead and date someone, then you have to be honest with yourself first, and find out exactly why you are going on that date.

You have to know yourself first, including your weaknesses...

And, if you are not sure, it is important to know that it's ok to say no or to cancel....

[abundanceofpraise]

I understand where you are coming from nina. I also believe That you shouldn't go on a date unless you really think that this person in a potential husband and spouse and Never settle for Less...

[giantsdodie]

the question of " how are you going to get to know someone " always pops up when Christians talk about dating. Lets be really honest. Dating someone doesnt necessarily show you the TRUE person. People wear masks, and we tend to place the face we want received forward more often than not. That means you can very easily fall prey to a deception. We like to think we are these great spiritual readers and judges of character and the reality is without GOD we arent.

I personally believe saints spend far too much time focusing on getting to know the other person and not anywhere near enough time getting to know JESUS, His will for their lives, and allow Jesus to reveal who HE is in them, who they are in HIM, and who HE is through them.

Who are you? What do you bring to the table ( and I aint talking about you cute, and you make a mean peach cobbler ).

What is your destiny? What had GOD called you to be and are you working toward being that.

I never dated. Yet I am married. How is that possible. Simple God showed me my wife YEARS before she showed up. I knew her character, her nature, God revealed to me the close relationship she has with her sister, God revealed to me the make up of her family ( very matriarchal ), God showed me how tall she was, her shape, the length of her hair.

God told me HIS will for our marriage was to break the generational curse of bad men and bad marriages off the women in her family. so that the next generation will see our marriage and say.. I am gonna wait for a man of GOD like she did.. Look how she is blessed.

God told me that her family is going to show me how to get my family saved ( about 2/3 of her family is saved not even 1/4 of my family is saved ). What they do, How they fast and pray over family members that are unsaved.

Dating aint gonna show you ANY of that. Because dating is all about what YOU can discover instead of what GOD can reveal.

[abundanceofpraise]

Wow Giant What a Testimony Thank you For sharing, that really encouraged me....I really really see what you are saying and That you are a True Witness to the way God works in a Relationship....That was real Deep, and it really really opened my eyes.....
Heyyy Giant I have a personal questian also Are you Apostolic??
Love
Jessica

[giantsdodie]

Nope not apolstolic, Just a Christian Im about as non denominational as you can get.