Internet "dating"

[vindicated]

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Problem number one...

People saying GOD did a thing doesnt necessarily mean GOD actually did it..

I know. And they still say it, in and out of the church. I was one of the ones who said it. been divorced 8 years now.

Problem number two... Marriage is a about a LOT more than TWO people...

I know

Problem number three... You can me MARRIED and be lonely...

Been there done that

Problem number four.... Sure unsaved people and meet and marry.. but are they affecting destiny and advancing the KINGDOM...

Problem five...how many saved couples are affecting destiny and advancing the kingdom? Very few compared to the number of couples sitting in church saying God put them together. Hardly any. Many of them are in marriage counseling trying to save their marriage after only a couple of years being together.

Sanits of God should have a much bigger much better picture of marriage and covenant. Its about a lot more than Im lonely and I need somebody and I wanna have kids before im too old. Those things are a part of marriage but they are not the totality of marriage.

Yes. Yes. Yes.

The problem as I see it is that some people see singleness as a blight and something that needs to be gotten rid of. Persoally I enjoyed my singleness. If I told the truth sometimes I actually miss it. Singleness is the perfect time to get close to Jesus, Know Him intimately, learn His plans for your Life, His will for you and then start working it out.

True. True. True. Single people want to be married. Married people miss singleness. Single people want to have sex. Married people don't.


I knew how tall she was BEFORE she showed up. I knew how long her hair was BEFORE she showed up. I knew she had long legs for her height. I knew her SPECIFIC ministry anointings BEFORE she showed up . I knew she had an older sister she was very close to BEFORE she showed up.

Whats my point.. The point is that it was in my SINGLENESS that God revealed these things to me. Personally I enjoyed my singleness greatly.

This is very common with me in particular. They generally feel like getting married means giving up something. Women generally feel like marriage is gaining something.

The bibele gives us council on how to treat the opposite sex. It tells men to treat the older women as mothers and the younger women and sisters.

That's exactly what my pastor teaches. So I guess what the guys in the church figure is, since these is my sistas I'll go outside the house to get my wife. And that's what they do.

Thats what I instruct the men in our church to do. Treat every woman you meet this way. Do not be alone with women. Watch your conversations with women. DO NOT mislead them or lead them on in anyway.

When my wife showed up at my church for the first time the WOMEN in the church told her, thats a good man there. He is not one of these brothers trying to get all up in a sisters face and he watches over the women of God like a protector.

I believe ESPECIALLY in the black church we need our men to stop acting like they are choosing from a harem, and learn to protect the women of GOD like a man of GOD should, and be about their fathers business.

I agree. Like the women are lined up on a smorgasboard (sp?) A lady at my church said that before she met her husband she started telling men, "I'm fresh out of samples!" My pastor says to the men all the time, that ain't no sampling in here.

I like the way the Lord told one of my friends when GOD showed him that one of the members of the ministry team was to be his wife. The Lord told him that it is time to take your relationship level from the brother and sister in Christ level to the husband and wife level.

And he got confirmation from GOD before he did it.


We need to be seeking the LORD about these marriages !!!

I %100 totally agree.

I have seen so much in the area of singleness in the church. I can understand how some will get to the point of "trying something different." I don't agree with it because in the end you lose, no matter what. It's never worth what it costs you in the end. Sometimes I think that's what it comes down to for people. Once they pay that price a few times they decide it's best to let God do the work.

I've seen on here that though many of us don't believe dating we don't all have the same reasons, or we didn't come to the conclusion all the same way.

I don't mean to sound like I'm picking or being indifferent for the sake of just talking. And I'm not arguing with anybody. I hate that. Maybe I'm just venting. I do have my moments when I just want to fuss it out. But I'm not fussing AT anybody who's posting.

My stance at this point is this...I'm single now because it's God's will at this point in my life. Working in church won't bring someone faster. Getting closer to God won't bring someone faster. Nothing I do will make God send me someone in a season that HE wants me to be unmarried.And more than anything NEITHER of these will take away my desire for marriage. You can't get busy enough in church or stay on your kness enough or fast enough to FORGET that you desire companionship. More than anything else we desire, we must desire HIS WILL for where we are right here, right now. I've been married and I've been single and I still prefer marriage. I know it's about purpose and destiny and that the one God has for me is my partner in ministry and purpose all the little fleshly things are just fringe benefits. But the true call of marriage is really a "call"

[vindicated]

I learned most of what I learned about my wife when I was SINGLE.

God has shown me quite a bit about my husband too. And then He makes you wait so long you begin to doubt it was Him. Anybody experienced this? I think it's my MAIN PROBLEM with where I am right now.

You have so many dreams. You receive so many prophecies. God speaks to you, shows you things in His word, then confirms what He showed you. But it still doesn't happen. And sometimes you go from believing to not believing, trying not to believe, wishing you could forget about what God showed you.
And finally wondering if it was God.

It's like the dream I had five years ago. Then it finally happened and I wish it hadn't. It hurt so bad that I still cry about it. I igonored it as long as I could but now the tears are seeping out. And I can't even ask why He did it because He wont' tell me. Nothing bad happened. No one was mean or rude to me. But I just don't know why God showed me something FIVE years in advance and then let it happen right at the time it would hurt the most. And it still hurts. It's like He set me up.....to hurt me. But I wrote two amazing poems....so is that why?

So how do you decide what He's showing you? He purposely throws curves, puposely does the opposite of what you thought He was going to do. Purposely lets you think He meant one thing and then shows you He meant nothing of the sort. And y'all know what He told me Friday night?

I DID IT ON PURPOSE FOR PURPOSE.

So for me, myself, personally, it's all a waste of time. Whether internet, church, blind date, no matter what. I'm single because it's God's will.


Maybe I'll be able to come back at a later date and have a different testimony. But I'm done holding my breath about it.

[giantsdodie]

Jul 21, 2008 15:03:22 GMT -5 @vindicated said:

I learned most of what I learned about my wife when I was SINGLE.

God has shown me quite a bit about my husband too. And then He makes you wait so long you begin to doubt it was Him. Anybody experienced this? I think it's my MAIN PROBLEM with where I am right now.

You have so many dreams. You receive so many prophecies. God speaks to you, shows you things in His word, then confirms what He showed you. But it still doesn't happen. And sometimes you go from believing to not believing, trying not to believe, wishing you could forget about what God showed you.
And finally wondering if it was God.

It's like the dream I had five years ago. Then it finally happened and I wish it hadn't. It hurt so bad that I still cry about it. I igonored it as long as I could but now the tears are seeping out. And I can't even ask why He did it because He wont' tell me. Nothing bad happened. No one was mean or rude to me. But I just don't know why God showed me something FIVE years in advance and then let it happen right at the time it would hurt the most. And it still hurts. It's like He set me up.....to hurt me. But I wrote two amazing poems....so is that why?

So how do you decide what He's showing you? He purposely throws curves, puposely does the opposite of what you thought He was going to do. Purposely lets you think He meant one thing and then shows you He meant nothing of the sort. And y'all know what He told me Friday night?

I DID IT ON PURPOSE FOR PURPOSE.

So for me, myself, personally, it's all a waste of time. Whether internet, church, blind date, no matter what. I'm single because it's God's will.


Maybe I'll be able to come back at a later date and have a different testimony. But I'm done holding my breath about it.

Personally in all honesty I think you need to keep talking... Ill have more to share later..

[giantsdodie]

Vindicated I would like to examine some of the statements you have made

God has shown me quite a bit about my husband too. And then He makes you wait so long you begin to doubt it was Him.

Why would allow the passage of time to make you doubt Him? The Word of God is full of examples of people who waited on Go for periods of time. Abraham wait 25 years to get Issac, Noah 120 until it rained.

You have so many dreams. You receive so many prophecies. God speaks to you, shows you things in His word, then confirms what He showed you. But it still doesn't happen. And sometimes you go from believing to not believing, trying not to believe, wishing you could forget about what God showed you.
And finally wondering if it was God.

This tells me you are struggling in areas of faith and we all do at times, I dont want to make it seems as if this is unique to you because it most certainly isnt. However when we waver n our faith we hinder GOD from doing exactly what HE said He would do in our lives. Sometimes it doesnt happen the way we THINK it should happen or the way we want it to happen. But when we get a better understanding of God's will we see it happened exactly the way GOD wanted it to happen.

It's like the dream I had five years ago. Then it finally happened and I wish it hadn't. It hurt so bad that I still cry about it. I igonored it as long as I could but now the tears are seeping out. And I can't even ask why He did it because He wont' tell me. Nothing bad happened. No one was mean or rude to me. But I just don't know why God showed me something FIVE years in advance and then let it happen right at the time it would hurt the most. And it still hurts. It's like He set me up.....to hurt me. But I wrote two amazing poems....so is that why?

This is where I have an issue. This mindset is one that seems to said. God did me wrong. God did me dirty. He treated me unfairly. That I cannot agree with.

So how do you decide what He's showing you? He purposely throws curves, puposely does the opposite of what you thought He was going to do. Purposely lets you think He meant one thing and then shows you He meant nothing of the sort. And y'all know what He told me Friday night?

I DID IT ON PURPOSE FOR PURPOSE.

I have some issues here. God doesnt throw curves. He doesnt operate in deception. He doesnt operate in lies or deceit. That is a heart that is saying that GOD is evil.

So for me, myself, personally, it's all a waste of time. Whether internet, church, blind date, no matter what. I'm single because it's God's will.

And this might be a little harsh what I am going to say.

But do you really think that a heart that believe God one minute and wishes that it never heard God the next, believes one minute yet doesnt believe the next, considers in some ways for God to be a liar and purposefully deceitful...

Is ready to receive one of GOD's sons, One of His princes in the Kingdom ??

Do you really ?

[giantsdodie]

Jul 21, 2008 13:24:14 GMT -5 kitty said:

I think the reason so many of us miss it is because we don't realize that ain't nuthin free except salavation! We want God to bless us with a mate but there is some serious responisbility to that. ESPECIALLY if we want God to be the one doing the choosing... That means we have a marriage that is dedicated to God, that is representing God, run by God, promoting God and most of us aren't doing that much on a good day! I'm just speaking for myself guys! Seriously... God started making me aware of the "cost" of what I have been asking Him to do in my life. I always thought the "cost" was simply living a good life, not having sex out side of marriage, going to church every Sunday... reading my bible. And yes that part of it... But for many of us... If we want God to bless us then that's just the TIP of the iceburg! LOL

In fact the stuff that you just mention the Bible calls

Your Reasonable Sevice.

Romans 12:1 AMP

Romans 12

1 I APPEAL to you therefore, brethren, and beg of you in view of [all] the mercies of God, to make a decisive dedication of your bodies [presenting all your members and faculties] as a living sacrifice, holy (devoted, consecrated) and well pleasing to God, which is your reasonable (rational, intelligent) service and spiritual worship.

[nina2]

(I don't want to interrupt the flow of the thread. Just putting in my little grain of salt...)

- The topic is about internet "dating", which is now common even for christians. But, that's not new, there were real life services like that way before that, and they still exist.

I know that they are a very flourishing business. And, I think, that's why I don't like the concept, never did. It's business, at the top. Even if they claim to be free (like the one at the top of the page right now ) I really don't believe that anything is free, especially for something like that.

Also, what truly bother me is why would anybody go and pay, and pay handsomely, for something that we believe and claim is from God, a present and gift from God, hence truly free?

- When it comes to "finding our soulmate":

It is an expression that the world out there has made its own. It's been used, misused and abused for so long, we know what we mean when we use it, but it is very difficult really to put into words.
And, imho, it's because it is so difficult when trying to explain it, to not take into consideration our own needs, wants and desires, and so it turns into not so much our definition of a soulmate, but rather into the definition of our soulmate, as we project it.

What's wrong with that? Nothing... It's normal, because it is normal to have that longing, actually it's a godly one. How we handle it and how it translates into our life and our relationship with God is what matters...

Even though, and it has been said on the thread already - and I believe it does matter a lot - the age of the person longing for soulmate makes a big difference, for me, the keyword is "soul". And, because of that, it is important, regardless of age, experiences, etc... to keep the longing for a "mate" at the level where it first belongs. And, it's not in the natural...

Then, come all the "but's" and we are not exempt of it. It's true, I think, for both men and women. Because, if it comes in the "right" package, looking good, smelling good, AND in church... so many just take off and run with it, and it can end up in a broken heart and soul...

Along those lines, what I have found out, is that we talk and experience a broken heart because, we think, of someone else. Somebody we believed we loved and loved us back.

However, we are told to love our neighbor as we "love ourself". So, I also believe that once we go through the experience of a "mismatch", for lack of a better word, and it lingers in our life, it seems to me that it is possible that, yes, we do have a broken heart. But, what we experience also afterwards is the knowledge - even if we are not fully aware of it - that we failed our own self, we traded our love for ourself, we failed to guard our own heart, and we are the very one who opened the door to the disappointment and pain and brokeness, but towards ourself, by our own "hands", not necessarily the other.
So, we learn, and painfully so, I can testify to that... We have to know our own self very well before we even venture into looking at someone else...

This is just an excerpt of something I read (well, you know how I am.... ) and imho, it puts the soulmate topic right where it belongs. And, that's why I like so much the question asked by Giants (in its absolute form):

"... ready to receive one of GOD's sons, One of His princes in the Kingdom??"

----------------------------------

Do I Have a Soulmate?

"The work of finding our soul mate is finding our missing half."

"So how do we find our other half? We have to first begin by perfecting our half. In other words, we have to really know ourselves and be the best "half" we can possibly be. Your soul mate is out there, that's not the question. The question is: are you where you need to be to find him? Are you recognizable to him? Don't forget, he's looking for you too."

"It is said that there are three partners in a marriage: the husband, the wife and God. Until we meet our soulmate, it's just two partners… us and God. This applies to that relationship as well. Because God does not typically grant us a bird's eye view of His plans, we need to constantly bolster our relationship with faith and trust. We need to trust in our depths that He is guiding our steps towards our ultimate purpose, towards the "completion" of our soul."

"As for the "guarantee," you want, one of the most powerful things about being in a relationship is that there are no guarantees. Faith and trust are such huge components in a marriage for this very reason. That's why our the love between a man and wife is compared to a fire. It is not static or calm, nor is it certain. It's not supposed to be. That is the beauty of a committed relationship…allowing someone into the most vulnerable and hidden places of our hearts trusting our emotions will be well received."

"Another strong component in marriage is communication. Communication is the essential ingredient to every healthy relationship. Since you are preparing to meet your life partner, it's important to practice communicating with your other partner, God. Talk it out with Him. Some people call it prayer, but it could just as well be called communication."

"Your "someone" is out there, looking for you. Be the best half-soul you can possibly be and God willing, your steps will be guided towards each other sooner than you know it."

[giantsdodie]

Nina thanks for sharing that.

I do have some issue with the latter part of the post that you provided.

We should never see ourselves as " halfs " looking to become whole..

The problem I have is with the math in that equation.

we see it as 1/2 + 1/2 = 1 whole...

When the reality it should be 1 x 1 = 1

Two whole persons comes together multipling what is in each other which leads to a glorious wholeness that represents the unity of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost each one who is completely GOD joined together inseperable from one another.

[nina2]

Amen Giants. I do agree with the math of that equation.

We have to be 100%, and, imho, it is the purpose of the process that we undergo while single that brings us to this level of wholeness, and prepares us, refines us, until we are the one God has meant for us to be.

I am among the ones who - after a long time and many tribulations - now agrees that "There is a blessing in the waiting".
When I was younger (no, not telling my age!) counting 1-2-3 was being very patient for me! LOL Now I can count further, I can even pause in my counting, and resume when He tells me to :-)

As you said so well a while back, sometimes we have to "unlearn" and then "learn".

Thanks Giants..

[vin]

Well, after my last two posts on this thread I deleted my account.

GDD, you've blessed me many times since the original board. I even just found something you said on a thread from a couple of years ago that blessed me. I found it when I was looking to see if a thread on internet dating had been started before.

But let me say that all the stuff you're saying, I know it, I've said it, I've said it to other people to encourage them, I'm taught it at my church, I believe it. But there are moments when I wish it could all go away. Because it HURTS! But as hard as I've tried, I can't quit. I can't even stop believing or let it go.


What I did the other day was puke out one of my moments. I know I'm not the only one who's been where I tend to "go" sometimes but I do know that most people don't verbalize or talk about those feelings. Talking about it makes you come across like a double minded person and God knows what else. But when you're waiting on God you experience a whole range of emotions. You're not dripping with faith at all times. Many days it's a pull on your emotions just to keep the faith. I've said before, I haven't been able to pray hard enough or get consecrated enough to make it go away. If anything it intensifies it and that can be frustrating. Maybe because I'm fighting sometimes NOT to believe it. Because believing hurts sometimes. Expectation is at times painful. Maybe I'm wrong for being one of the ones who always talks about it. But I seem to have been "anointed/gifted" with transparency.

I didn't mean to sound like I think God is evil. Or that He did me wrong or treated me unfairly. I know He never promised to be fair, but just and righteous. To my flesh of course it feels unfair. But fair is not the issue and I know that. I know He's not being unjust. I know He loves me. I know He has my best interest at heart. I know that whenever He does whatever He does He always has and will continue to leave me with a grateful heart that He did things the way He did them. I know within my heart of hearts that there will be a day when I will look back on these few days and maybe even laugh at myself and my temper tantrums. Even though right now I just wish I knew what He was doing.

I wish I knew WHY He did that one thing in particular the way He did it. Then I look at those two amazing poems I wrote as a result I know I wouldn't have written them under any other circumstance and I honestly wouldn't take it back if it meant not writing those poems. (it's like looking at your newborn after suffering labor pains) Most of my poems have come like that, out of intense pain.

I don't think God is evil. I don't think He's a liar. As strong as I can be, that's how weak I feel at times. I'm not always full of faith. And I have NEVER wanted to be one of those Christians who always tries to talk strong as if I never feel anything, as if I always believe and never have battles.

When I said He throws me curves I just mean that so many times I think I have figured out at least something about what He was doing but by the time He moves again, it's in an entirely different direction than what I thought. It's like being driven into the wilderness. He does do these things on purpose. He knows they will hurt. Does He always end up making me glad for the experience? Yes. So I have to trust His motives and His reasons even when He doesn't explain Himself to me.

I know He's not making fun of me or playing games with me.
Like I said, I was having a moment and instead of being quiet I puked it out on this BB. I regret that quite a bit. I wanted to delete all my posts before deleting my account. I didn't want to leave all that on record. I still wish I could erase it all.

[giantsdodie]

But let me say that all the stuff you're saying, I know it, I've said it, I've said it to other people to encourage them, I'm taught it at my church, I believe it. But there are moments when I wish it could all go away. Because it HURTS! But as hard as I've tried, I can't quit. I can't even stop believing or let it go.

Let me give u a story that happened while my mother was sick and dying in a hospital bed.

My mother was sick the last two weeks of her life. Mostly on morphine because of the pain she was in dying of cancer. I went to the hospital every day to see her even though most times she didnt even know I was there in the room.

She had asked me to believe with her that she would be healed. For a time it looked like things were getting better then everything took a turn for the worse ( I didnt realize untl after her death that she had stopped taking the treatments )

I was in the hospital praying and believing GOD for her healing. Now there were lots of people who were believers and saints yet they had pretty much written her off after seeing her condition. Many of them were pastors and church leaders.

I would come after everyone else had left because I rushed down after work and only had an hour before visiting hours would close. I would pray in the room silently as not to disturb the other patient.

One day I was walking home and it was raining. I was glad I didnt have an umbrella because no one could see I was crying while walking down the street. She looked worse and worse and yet I couldnt stop believing. I simply couldnt turn it off.

I said out loud in the street. LORD I just cant stop believing ( what I was really saying is WHY am I still believing )

The Lord QUICKLY answered and said...

Of course you cant.. Thats what believers DO. BELIEVERS BELIEVE !!!!!!!!

Now my mother was an evangelist with an anointing in the area of healing. I am NOT an evangelist in any way shape or form nor do i operate in the healing ministry. My calling leans more toward teaching and the prophetic ministry.

There was this Jewish lady who was there the whole time my mom was sick.

I came and sat down one day and just sat. Didnt pray or say a word. The Lady spoke to me and said...

"I like it when you come here... "

I said " Oh really "

She said " yes I like all your family your dad and your aunts " ( somehow she deduced exactly who was who ), " But I really lije it when you come ".

She said " I dont know why but there is a great peace that comes with you when you come in the room "

I just listened.

She said " I hear the prayers you pray for your mother" ( which must have been hard because I was whispering as not to disturb her), " Those are powerful prayers she said "

I said " Ma' am I believe in a powerful God "

She asked ' Do you think that I can have the same peace that comes with you when you come in the room "

I said " Of course you can lets pray "

Led an old white Jewish woman to receive JESUS CHRIST right there in the room that day with my sick, unconcious mother laying in the bed.

I found out her name was Rose and prayer for her healing ( she had a bad infection and had been there longer than my mother )

She said can U get me a bible I can read. I said SURE...

Next day I came back to deliver the Bible and she was GONE...

I asked the nurse.. what happened to Rose??!!!!!

She said.. " Oh Rose went home... "

I was like " WHAT !!!! "

The Nurse said.. yes Her infection cleared right up and they released her this morning...

I just sat in the chair... looked at my still unconcious mother the Evangelist with the healing ministry and laughed and said..

" Now you got me doing YOUR job "

Two days later my mother passed away....

A few weeks later I was thinking about everything that had happened and the Lord spoke to me and said...

" Remember when I spoek to you and told you that it is very easy for you to believe me for things and even to believe me for hard things (thats simply because GOD has given me that kind of faith ) BUT I told you that I would teach you to believe me for the IMPOSSIBLE.. "

I said yeah Lord I remember...

He said.. I just did that...

You Believed me whole heartedly when everything was saying STOP believing. You evene believed me in the cab on the way after they called and told you that your mother was gone. Until you got there and saw her dead you STILL BELIEVED...

I said yeah but Lord she still died...

He said YES but you STILL BELIEVED...

And in that believing a SOUL was added to the Kingdom...

An UBELIEVER was affected by the faithful prayers of one person and felt the PEACE OF GOD which passes all understand WALKING in the room with them each time they visited !!!!

So much so that they made it up in their mind that they wanted that same peace for themselves and that peace is JESUS !!!!!

Which is greater???

The saving of ONE...

or the death of another...

Sometimes we never fully understand what GOD is working out...

but KEEP BELIEVING !!!!!

Ive been hurt.. Hurt when my mom died.. but KEEP BELIEVING...

[Poetricia (G.A.P.)]

Wow, I stand in awe of an Almighty God and his mighty teaching servant.

Giants, sometimes certain threads make me disappear from this board, but THESE are the kinds of posts that keep me coming back to this board, for the ministry I find, the teaching, the testimony, the truth that ALL IS NOT LOST.

Thanks for sharing, it may have took something out of you to post that, but thanks be to God it surely put something in us!!!!!

[kitty]

Giants,

Over the years I have been blessed many times by your testimonies... And this testimony has really blessed me today! Thanks for being a willing, open and humble servant to the Lord... Glory be to God!

God Bless!

Kitty

[vin]

I appreciate you sharing that. It helps some. I think also that if I come back at a later date and read it again, I'll see even more than I'm able to see today. Heartache tends to blur vision.

But

Of course you cant.. Thats what believers DO. BELIEVERS BELIEVE !!!!!!!!

says a lot to me right now. I'm a believer. So trying not to believe for a believer, is really to fight a losing battle. It reminds me of the message preached on Sunday and how the minister was talking about how one minute you can be like David, fussing, asking God where are you? Why won't you answer me!? And by the time you get to the second half of the psalm he's saying yet will I praise Him. I will love the Lord and so on. And he was explaining that it's because when God placed Himself in us He placed in us something that CAN'T give up. So even after we go through all the doubts and fears and negativity, something deep inside of us is still holding on for dear life. And so this is what you've said here.

So what I think I'm receiving from this is that when I feel that way I'm just at the height of a battle between my flesh and my spirit. Faith is hard on the flesh. But the spirit feeds on it. And the Spirit of God feeds faith into us from the beginning.

Now I know why I can't give up on this thing.


Thanks again for sharing that.

[Jasmine]

My GOD!

Giants the anointing of the Lord was upon you this morning to write that post. I am so grateful that today I decided to stop by the singles thread. Glory to God!

Your post quickly reminded me of the exact same feelings I experienced when I was going through my own situation. As much as I wanted to stop believing, I could not stop. I can even take it one step further, I didn't even know how NOT to believe.

I want to also say that, yes you operate in the giftings of teaching and prophecy, however my brother, you also have that "breaking up the fallow ground" way about you, so I would not be surprised if you find yourself evangelizing across the nation, through your teaching and prophetic ministry.

Wooo, I have been totally blessed this morning. Thank you for sharing such a provoking testimony!

[stillfocused]

GDD...thanks for sharing. It's testamonies like the one you have shared that has made to realize that I can stand in the midst of..and accept that I cannot run away..thanks !!