Post by vindicated on Jul 21, 2008 14:31:20 GMT -5
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Problem number one...
People saying GOD did a thing doesnt necessarily mean GOD actually did it..
I know. And they still say it, in and out of the church. I was one of the ones who said it. been divorced 8 years now.
Problem number two... Marriage is a about a LOT more than TWO people...
I know
Problem number three... You can me MARRIED and be lonely...
Been there done that
Problem number four.... Sure unsaved people and meet and marry.. but are they affecting destiny and advancing the KINGDOM...
Problem five...how many saved couples are affecting destiny and advancing the kingdom? Very few compared to the number of couples sitting in church saying God put them together. Hardly any. Many of them are in marriage counseling trying to save their marriage after only a couple of years being together.
Sanits of God should have a much bigger much better picture of marriage and covenant. Its about a lot more than Im lonely and I need somebody and I wanna have kids before im too old. Those things are a part of marriage but they are not the totality of marriage.
Yes. Yes. Yes.
The problem as I see it is that some people see singleness as a blight and something that needs to be gotten rid of. Persoally I enjoyed my singleness. If I told the truth sometimes I actually miss it. Singleness is the perfect time to get close to Jesus, Know Him intimately, learn His plans for your Life, His will for you and then start working it out.
True. True. True. Single people want to be married. Married people miss singleness. Single people want to have sex. Married people don't.
I knew how tall she was BEFORE she showed up. I knew how long her hair was BEFORE she showed up. I knew she had long legs for her height. I knew her SPECIFIC ministry anointings BEFORE she showed up . I knew she had an older sister she was very close to BEFORE she showed up.
Whats my point.. The point is that it was in my SINGLENESS that God revealed these things to me. Personally I enjoyed my singleness greatly.
This is very common with me in particular. They generally feel like getting married means giving up something. Women generally feel like marriage is gaining something.
The bibele gives us council on how to treat the opposite sex. It tells men to treat the older women as mothers and the younger women and sisters.
That's exactly what my pastor teaches. So I guess what the guys in the church figure is, since these is my sistas I'll go outside the house to get my wife. And that's what they do.
Thats what I instruct the men in our church to do. Treat every woman you meet this way. Do not be alone with women. Watch your conversations with women. DO NOT mislead them or lead them on in anyway.
When my wife showed up at my church for the first time the WOMEN in the church told her, thats a good man there. He is not one of these brothers trying to get all up in a sisters face and he watches over the women of God like a protector.
I believe ESPECIALLY in the black church we need our men to stop acting like they are choosing from a harem, and learn to protect the women of GOD like a man of GOD should, and be about their fathers business.
I agree. Like the women are lined up on a smorgasboard (sp?) A lady at my church said that before she met her husband she started telling men, "I'm fresh out of samples!" My pastor says to the men all the time, that ain't no sampling in here.
I like the way the Lord told one of my friends when GOD showed him that one of the members of the ministry team was to be his wife. The Lord told him that it is time to take your relationship level from the brother and sister in Christ level to the husband and wife level.
And he got confirmation from GOD before he did it.
We need to be seeking the LORD about these marriages !!!
I %100 totally agree.
I have seen so much in the area of singleness in the church. I can understand how some will get to the point of "trying something different." I don't agree with it because in the end you lose, no matter what. It's never worth what it costs you in the end. Sometimes I think that's what it comes down to for people. Once they pay that price a few times they decide it's best to let God do the work.
I've seen on here that though many of us don't believe dating we don't all have the same reasons, or we didn't come to the conclusion all the same way.
I don't mean to sound like I'm picking or being indifferent for the sake of just talking. And I'm not arguing with anybody. I hate that. Maybe I'm just venting. I do have my moments when I just want to fuss it out. But I'm not fussing AT anybody who's posting.
My stance at this point is this...I'm single now because it's God's will at this point in my life. Working in church won't bring someone faster. Getting closer to God won't bring someone faster. Nothing I do will make God send me someone in a season that HE wants me to be unmarried.And more than anything NEITHER of these will take away my desire for marriage. You can't get busy enough in church or stay on your kness enough or fast enough to FORGET that you desire companionship. More than anything else we desire, we must desire HIS WILL for where we are right here, right now. I've been married and I've been single and I still prefer marriage. I know it's about purpose and destiny and that the one God has for me is my partner in ministry and purpose all the little fleshly things are just fringe benefits. But the true call of marriage is really a "call"
Problem number one...
People saying GOD did a thing doesnt necessarily mean GOD actually did it..
I know. And they still say it, in and out of the church. I was one of the ones who said it. been divorced 8 years now.
Problem number two... Marriage is a about a LOT more than TWO people...
I know
Problem number three... You can me MARRIED and be lonely...
Been there done that
Problem number four.... Sure unsaved people and meet and marry.. but are they affecting destiny and advancing the KINGDOM...
Problem five...how many saved couples are affecting destiny and advancing the kingdom? Very few compared to the number of couples sitting in church saying God put them together. Hardly any. Many of them are in marriage counseling trying to save their marriage after only a couple of years being together.
Sanits of God should have a much bigger much better picture of marriage and covenant. Its about a lot more than Im lonely and I need somebody and I wanna have kids before im too old. Those things are a part of marriage but they are not the totality of marriage.
Yes. Yes. Yes.
The problem as I see it is that some people see singleness as a blight and something that needs to be gotten rid of. Persoally I enjoyed my singleness. If I told the truth sometimes I actually miss it. Singleness is the perfect time to get close to Jesus, Know Him intimately, learn His plans for your Life, His will for you and then start working it out.
True. True. True. Single people want to be married. Married people miss singleness. Single people want to have sex. Married people don't.
I knew how tall she was BEFORE she showed up. I knew how long her hair was BEFORE she showed up. I knew she had long legs for her height. I knew her SPECIFIC ministry anointings BEFORE she showed up . I knew she had an older sister she was very close to BEFORE she showed up.
Whats my point.. The point is that it was in my SINGLENESS that God revealed these things to me. Personally I enjoyed my singleness greatly.
This is very common with me in particular. They generally feel like getting married means giving up something. Women generally feel like marriage is gaining something.
The bibele gives us council on how to treat the opposite sex. It tells men to treat the older women as mothers and the younger women and sisters.
That's exactly what my pastor teaches. So I guess what the guys in the church figure is, since these is my sistas I'll go outside the house to get my wife. And that's what they do.
Thats what I instruct the men in our church to do. Treat every woman you meet this way. Do not be alone with women. Watch your conversations with women. DO NOT mislead them or lead them on in anyway.
When my wife showed up at my church for the first time the WOMEN in the church told her, thats a good man there. He is not one of these brothers trying to get all up in a sisters face and he watches over the women of God like a protector.
I believe ESPECIALLY in the black church we need our men to stop acting like they are choosing from a harem, and learn to protect the women of GOD like a man of GOD should, and be about their fathers business.
I agree. Like the women are lined up on a smorgasboard (sp?) A lady at my church said that before she met her husband she started telling men, "I'm fresh out of samples!" My pastor says to the men all the time, that ain't no sampling in here.
I like the way the Lord told one of my friends when GOD showed him that one of the members of the ministry team was to be his wife. The Lord told him that it is time to take your relationship level from the brother and sister in Christ level to the husband and wife level.
And he got confirmation from GOD before he did it.
We need to be seeking the LORD about these marriages !!!
I %100 totally agree.
I have seen so much in the area of singleness in the church. I can understand how some will get to the point of "trying something different." I don't agree with it because in the end you lose, no matter what. It's never worth what it costs you in the end. Sometimes I think that's what it comes down to for people. Once they pay that price a few times they decide it's best to let God do the work.
I've seen on here that though many of us don't believe dating we don't all have the same reasons, or we didn't come to the conclusion all the same way.
I don't mean to sound like I'm picking or being indifferent for the sake of just talking. And I'm not arguing with anybody. I hate that. Maybe I'm just venting. I do have my moments when I just want to fuss it out. But I'm not fussing AT anybody who's posting.
My stance at this point is this...I'm single now because it's God's will at this point in my life. Working in church won't bring someone faster. Getting closer to God won't bring someone faster. Nothing I do will make God send me someone in a season that HE wants me to be unmarried.And more than anything NEITHER of these will take away my desire for marriage. You can't get busy enough in church or stay on your kness enough or fast enough to FORGET that you desire companionship. More than anything else we desire, we must desire HIS WILL for where we are right here, right now. I've been married and I've been single and I still prefer marriage. I know it's about purpose and destiny and that the one God has for me is my partner in ministry and purpose all the little fleshly things are just fringe benefits. But the true call of marriage is really a "call"