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Post by Beck on Dec 29, 2006 13:34:47 GMT -5
First let me say happy holidays to everyone. I have been very busy with my new job, so I havent been able to post on the threads as much. I hope and pray that all is well with each of you.
My question is this.. What should happen if a couple gets married and but they belong to different churches? Is it Biblical that the wife always has to leave and join her husband, or should the husband leave and join with his wife. Does the scriptures give any light on this subject or is it just about the husband and wife coming together and figuring out the best direction for themselves?
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Post by Hischild on Dec 29, 2006 14:00:18 GMT -5
Wow, what a great question!! I would like to know the answer to that too, because I'm going through that situation!!
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Post by kanyon on Dec 29, 2006 14:52:18 GMT -5
Depending on the size of the community, they could agree to start fresh and contribute together at a totally new fellowship. That would be one way to submit to each other.
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Post by Beck on Dec 29, 2006 14:56:29 GMT -5
Depending on the size of the community, they could agree to start fresh and contribute together at a totally new fellowship. That would be one way to submit to each other. What if the woman believes that she shouldnt leave her home church, but she is willing because she wants to keep the peace with her husband. Should she stand knowing where she belongs, or compromise because she wants her husband to be happy? |
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Post by And Such Were Some Of You on Dec 29, 2006 16:03:28 GMT -5
Honestly, in situations like this, one really need to spend time in prayer together and see what the Holy Spirit would reveal in the matter. That is the next best thing when the bible is absolutely silent on the matter.
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Post by kanyon on Dec 29, 2006 18:11:32 GMT -5
Depending on the size of the community, they could agree to start fresh and contribute together at a totally new fellowship. That would be one way to submit to each other. What if the woman believes that she shouldnt leave her home church, but she is willing because she wants to keep the peace with her husband. Should she stand knowing where she belongs, or compromise because she wants her husband to be happy? My dear brother, your response is so full of clues...of course its easy for me to coment being a few thousand miles away hey?  |
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Post by stillfocused on Dec 29, 2006 23:53:04 GMT -5
There is a workable solution..until the Holy Spirit moves upon either the husband's or wife's heart. Though it is not scriptual..they can attend both churches..by alternating every other Sunday. This is what my parents did for approx. 30 yrs. until my Dad offlicially "left" his family church and became a part of "her" family's church. And it worked..as strange as it was. Thinking about it that was submission at work..as they submitted to one another. As for the children..they never pressured to anyway to make a commitment to either place..that decision was left up to us.
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Post by Nikkol on Dec 30, 2006 11:27:44 GMT -5
In scripture we normally see the wife leaving her family and moving with the husband. We see that Sarah was with Abraham and his family, Rebekah left to be with Isaac and after Jacob's "years of service" he left as well.
Additionally, being that the man is the head of the household, the wife should be with the husband. That is, that the final decision should be made by the husband.
Personally, I think that it looks more unified when the husband and wife go to the same church and the children as well.
It is true that they can both go to a totally different church altogether. Before my husband and I got married, I went to one church and he went to another. When we got married, I went to his church. I didn't really want to, however for unity within our relationship (worshipping together) I went and at the appointed time, we went to a totally different church.
Wouldn't that mean that she believes that she doesn't belong with her husband in worship? Is it possible that two people, that should now be one flesh are one flesh worshipping at two separate places?
In a time when we are seeing so many Christian marriages (at least 50%) ending in divorce, and a lack of men in many churches, it becomes very difficult for many to find "marriage examples" within the church. I've talked to my husband on many occassions even in reference to where pastor's sit vs. where their wives sit... why is it that most of the times, the pastor sits in one area and the wife sits in another.? (same with deacons, trustees, etc). The only time that usually one can see married couples worshipping together is during "marriage conferences" which many time are specifically for married couples.
I believe that it is very important that families worship together. I can understand for a short period alternating churches. (I think that Will and I did that for a month..... I believe that also was before we got married though) However, I think that it makes both people not able to fully commit to one place.
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Post by krazeeboi on Dec 30, 2006 21:26:25 GMT -5
Well, all of us were attending my dad's home church (which is AME) before my mom received the Holy Ghost and then starting attending an Apostolic church. Me and my siblings went with her, and it's been like that to this day. My dad is still at his home church, but we are praying for God to complete the work.
However, when both husband and wife are Holy Ghost-filled, there really shouldn't be any disparity, I think.
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Post by stillfocused on Dec 31, 2006 9:42:51 GMT -5
Yes, it can be found in the Bible that when a woman married she moved to her husband's place of residence. Ruth, left her country and followed her Mother-in-law. I have not been able to find anything in the Word that says that a wife should her place of fellowship to worship at the church her husband worships. Sadly, this one topic that is not discussed before marriage. About commiting to one place..is really not the fact of truth in alternating churches..yet, it's the commitment to Christ that's most important factor of all. The Word of God tells the man to leave his Mother and Father, to cleave unto his wife and that shall be come one flesh...so, how does that play into the equation ? And just maybe at this season in lives that neither place is where God would have them to be. As there are times that God is bringing change into our lives that things turn upside down. I agree with Krazeeboi..the Holy Spirit is very important.
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Post by giantsdodie on Jan 1, 2007 8:19:20 GMT -5
In this kind of situation you pray and following the leading of the Holy Spirit. In all honesty IMO we should never try and figure out what is best for ourselved cause in reality we dont know what is best. God does.
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Post by MsKayLander on Jan 1, 2007 21:22:30 GMT -5
Honestly, in situations like this, one really need to spend time in prayer together and see what the Holy Spirit would reveal in the matter. That is the next best thing when the bible is absolutely silent on the matter. I agree with you on that one. When I got married, my husband joined the church I attended. We went to different services, but the same church... :-) |
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Post by livinganewlife on Jan 2, 2007 10:19:55 GMT -5
Timely question, I am dealing with this right now!
There are two ministers who have married and the wife is being (persuaded) to leave her home church where she is in ministry...
should the wife leave her duties at her church to attend her husbands church who does not allow women to work in ministry?
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Post by Beck on Jan 2, 2007 10:33:27 GMT -5
Well, all of us were attending my dad's home church (which is AME) before my mom received the Holy Ghost and then starting attending an Apostolic church. Me and my siblings went with her, and it's been like that to this day. My dad is still at his home church, but we are praying for God to complete the work. However, when both husband and wife are Holy Ghost-filled, there really shouldn't be any disparity, I think. wait...so you mean to tell me that ame churches dont have the holyghost?     |
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Post by And Such Were Some Of You on Jan 2, 2007 11:01:18 GMT -5
Timely question, I am dealing with this right now! There are two ministers who have married and the wife is being (persuaded) to leave her home church where she is in ministry... should the wife leave her duties at her church to attend her husbands church who does not allow women to work in ministry? Honestly, in situations like this, one really need to spend time in prayer together and see what the Holy Spirit would reveal in the matter. That is the next best thing when the bible is absolutely silent on the matter. |
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