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Post by Beck on Oct 2, 2007 8:24:11 GMT -5
Now this is my humble opinion on what defiles and dishonors a marriage. 1. Is your thoughts: you are having sex and in your mind you are thinking of that woman or that man who works at the job, or you saw at the gym or God forbid you saw on a porn flick. What this does is brings dishonor to your mate.. you no longer enjoy and celebrate them worth and the favor that they have, Remember the Greek meaning for Honorable also means "of a great price, and precious, esteemed, especially dear". That which was paid with a great price is now sold for a cheap moment of a unpure thought of someone that isn't joined to you.
#2 Cursing in the bedroom.. This was something that God had to deal with me with, not during sex, but before I was saved, I cursed like a sailor..lol. I cursed when I was happy and I cursed when I was upset, I would curse for the heck of it. But thank God for his power and deliverance! Words have life.. You call your wife a B during sex.. you really have some issues If you yell out some foul words towards your husband during intercourse then you need to change that.. I have to remind myself not to use the Lords name in vain though..LOL LOL LOL ;D pray for me y'all.
Marriage is a reflection of Gods love towards his people, and intercourse is a way to show our love and affection towards our mate, not an opportunity to disrespect and dishonor your spouse. Also having a high sex drive isn't being freak.. it just for folk who just can get enough of the sugar golden crisp..or for the one who like chocolate chip cookies.."betcha cant have just one"...LOLOLLOL. Lastly let me say this.. I celebrate my wife every inch of her... and I make sure she knows it.. and I thank God for every chance we get to touch and agree in JESUS NAME...HOLLAAAAAAA!!!
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Post by keita on Oct 2, 2007 12:56:16 GMT -5
And thanks for the alteration to the topic sis k. And by the way folks i am allowed online at work just not on certain sites with certain words-integrity anyone? rofl! You're welcome and I was just teasing you... and sis AT!  I am tired of every time a discussion like this comes up in a lot of christian circles it is always the negative that we look at. I'm just hoping that we will begin to look for and at the truth about this issue, as well as teach and advise others... according to scripture...and not our own particular personal preferences or hang-ups. To me, our getting and/or having it right about this is just too HUGE of a matter in terms of its potential consequences. I think that is certainly ideal but just not as automatic as you're implying. We do come to Christ with our learned mindsets and behaviors in full effect. We then live and we learn and are continuously transformed... on the journey. So then, as long as there's no "cussing" in our "bedroom talk", we're alright? Can we "talk dirty" without cuss words? I'm trying to get some specific answers regarding this and other marriage bed practices and preferences because that's what I think a lot of us are looking for when asking, wondering and worrying about things like, "Is this okay with GOD?" "What about this?" "How do we know?" That's exactly why I culled this topic away from the JB/TW issue. I think the subject is MUCH bigger and broader than the two them and their bedroom style. And I think it may be about more than simply what they, or we, do and don't "prefer". 'Cause, like a lot of us, (and apparently TW, lol!) keita does (still) have some long standing and dearly loved "preferences" herself, lol! But that certainly doesn't mean those "preferences" of mine are necessarily acceptable or pleasing to GOD. And, honestly until the last time we discussed this, I can't say that I'd ever really asked HIM for or concerned myself with HIS thoughts on the matter. Is it really just me?  Oh, I do agree with you about that. Because once I got past ROFL at and about TW's "transparency", I believe it really is about so much more than his (or anyone else's) personal "freakiness", or lack thereof. If anything, TW's (mis)teaching on the video, our recognizing that it's off, and discussing why is merely an impetus. It just happened to offer a good, and perhaps timely, opportunity for some scriptural search and discussion of not only that particular teaching, but the broader subject. So I'm with you...let's do that.  |
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Post by MsKayLander on Oct 2, 2007 14:22:49 GMT -5
it just for folk who just can get enough of the sugar golden crisp..or for the one who like chocolate chip cookies.."betcha cant have just one"...LOLOLLOL BECK, I HOOTED!!!!! That was TOO FUNNY!!!! I lost my soda and some more stuff! ;D |
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Post by MsKayLander on Oct 2, 2007 14:26:16 GMT -5
I had to speak to a couple about this cause they was using some words during the act.... it got real good and they just blurted it out...  I don't think it should be a practice, but as much as we hate to admit it... during the act, we may get in our flesh.... I have to be honest... I ain't thinking about spiritual stuff either! |
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Post by keita on Oct 2, 2007 15:03:10 GMT -5
I had to speak to a couple about this cause they was using some words during the act....it got real good and they just blurted it out... What did you say to them? Why or why not? [/size][/quote] LOL! Indeed, it just be's that way sometimes, lol!. |
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Post by MsKayLander on Oct 2, 2007 15:16:23 GMT -5
I had to speak to a couple about this cause they was using some words during the act....it got real good and they just blurted it out... What did you say to them? Why or why not? [/size][/quote] LOL! Indeed, it just be's that way sometimes, lol!. [/quote] Well, I basically told them not to beat themselves up about it because they were very upset about it. I asked them did they repent and told them not to make it a part of foreplay! Well, some things I used to do I don't anymore. I don't believe we have to take it to that extreme.... HOWEVER, sometimes when you are ummmmm, not into the "niceties" of the moment.... stuff happens and you don't know WHERE stuff comes from. I don't ever believe that it is intended to express ourselves in that way.... sometimes you feel funny calling on the LORD....  |
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Post by anointedteacher on Oct 2, 2007 16:12:00 GMT -5
This is from Chirstian Sexuality....
16. Anavah |
I agree with you Michelle. Bynum looked like she wanted the floor to open up and swallow her. But then again, when I watched the video where she talked about how she was going to beat bishop Weeks with a brick, he didn’t look too comfortable about that either. Did you see that one? I wonder which one was taped first. Did they make a point of trying to embarrass each other from the pulpit to test how gracefully it would handled?
This was obviously a very unhealthy marriage throughout. I learned a lot from their folly. My husband and I have examined our marriage with a fine tooth comb ever since the Paula and Bynum fiascoes. We saw a lot of area’s of error in our lives as a couple and as preachers that we have since taken to the altar. I don’t want to end up that way!!!
In terms of the video, the summary as I see it, as to what Bishop Weeks was saying is that the bedroom is the place to be defiled. His estimation seems to be that since the bedroom is “undefiled” that you can do anything in the bedroom and it become purified as long as it is done in the bedroom!!! He said “don’t bring your salvation into the bedroom”. How much plainer could it be? Even if the rest of the video was utterly confusing, he summed it all up with that one statement. Hey everybody, we get to be sinner’s in the bedroom as long as we’re married becuse it balances out our salvation. Yeahhhhh!!!
Whateva — that is just pure sickness. By his doctrine we could murder someone in the bedroom, smoke a pipe, rape a baby, watch porn, ANYTHING, ANYTHING AT ALL!
For all of those foolish people sitting there that pushed away the conviction of the Holy Spirit to listen to the lies of a man with their itching ears, they will get what they deserve. Remember that Yah says in scripture in Timothy that he send a strong delusion to those that push the truth away from themselves. Only people who want to be deceived get deceived and stay deceived. Juanita Bynum taught me that. Thanks Juanita for teaching me how not to be like you!!!
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Post by livinganewlife on Oct 2, 2007 18:22:16 GMT -5
Oh my lawd yall have shot off up in here ;D IMO it is thoughts that defile the marriage......even if you do call your wife the B word or the W word....it is still something in your spirit or mind that takes you back to a particular place and time where using that word or applying that word during sex was appropriate....... Those words in and of themselves are degrading and why would one want to degrade their wife and why would a wife want to be degraded...... Now, personally for me i do know that everytime I want to stray outside of what one would consider "godly" lovemaking it always come at a time when I am either thinking back or comparing my husband moves to someone else.... For you all who married as virgins you may not understand what I'm talking bout One thing JB said in No more sheets was that many women are telling their husbands, spank me, flip me, hang me and all that stuff is because we are comparing or desiring in our hearts the same acts or feelings we experienced when we were with "boo" and "nem" |
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Post by Jasmine on Oct 2, 2007 18:26:49 GMT -5
LOL @hang me
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Post by Jasmine on Oct 2, 2007 21:11:01 GMT -5
Now with post like these, I must use the disclaimer that Nikkol has posted as her signature, because often times people can assume many things based on comments.
I earnestly believe that what a husband and his wife does in their bed, and they are agreement in it is their business. Its between them and God. Now I do not believe that a husband and wife should engage in any acts that will cause them to "loose their salvation".
Intimacy between a husband and wife is a beautiful, PRIVATE thing. And it should remain that way.
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Post by keita on Oct 2, 2007 23:31:21 GMT -5
WOW, y'all!!! This discussion is really saying SO MUCH!  ;D  But as a Christian woman of GOD, with some "preferences" of her own and reading this thread, I'm still not sure whether to wave my "freak flag" high, only raise it to half mast, quietly retire it to the attic, or just burn it in repentance, lol! So honestly, at this point, I'm just really working on rightly dividing and understanding Hebrews 13:4 as GOD intended. Can I get some help with that here?  Or do I need to start a separate thread in the "Bible Study" section? 'Cause y'all know I will, lol!  |
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Post by abundanceofpraise on Oct 2, 2007 23:45:21 GMT -5
I heard that kieta Gurl!!! Im learnin alote as well!!!
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Post by keita on Oct 3, 2007 0:38:16 GMT -5
This is from Chirstian Sexuality....
"...I learned a lot from their folly. My husband and I have examined our marriage with a fine tooth comb ever since the Paula and Bynum fiascoes. We saw a lot of area’s of error in our lives as a couple and as preachers that we have since taken to the altar. I don’t want to end up that way!!!..." Sis AT, I think that sister's comment is exactly the kind of juice GOD wants from the grapes of JB/TW's and P&R's current situations. For us as observers, I believe that was/is, GOD's very purpose of their public exposure. I pray that these things that are occurring in the media with these very public religious figures will cause us to ask the questions that would in turn cause us to take spiritual inventory of and examine our own selves. And that's exactly why I started this thread. |
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Post by krazeeboi on Oct 3, 2007 1:58:38 GMT -5
But I don't think the context of that scripture changes any of the the fact and truth of the words Jesus spoke regarding what is (and isn't) defiling to us, and how that works. So, what are you thinking about Mt 15:11? As we all should know, words in and of themselves mean nothing and are powerless. Words are containers of meaning. They are symbols. One word in one context can mean something totally different in another context. When Jesus said that what comes out of a man defiles him, it isn't just words that he's speaking about. The fact of the matter is that no four-letter word or racial or sexist slur has power in and of itself. You're defiled by your words when the intent is to harm. If my wife and I have an understanding, then we both know that the intent of certain words used is not to harm. Now, to me, that doesn't mean that I advocate saying any and everything in the bedroom, like Weeks does. |
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Post by abundanceofpraise on Oct 3, 2007 2:08:53 GMT -5
Hummmmmmmm Krazeeboi very interesting point but Some words the True Saints of God just shouldn't say at all............How can blessings and Cursings come out of the same fountain.......
God dont bless over no mess!!!!!!!!
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I don't think it should be a practice, but as much as we hate to admit it... during the act, we may get in our flesh.... I have to be honest... I ain't thinking about spiritual stuff either! 
